Episode 10 – The Whole Nine Blades

Pickaxe You've seen them around, they sell sweets by the pound Their wares are famously tasty Here I sing, singing to you Of crimes involving chemistry Clover's the whisper, she makes all the sweets She has a corn dog addiction Benton's the slide, she sleeps the same And rice can fire a fanfiction Franklin's the cutter, his fighters strength Despite his dance, his heart Best and brightest, they may not be But that's my favorite part So gather round, friends And listen close For the tale's about to start Let's do it.

Okay. Sean, start! I'm trying, I have a mouth and throat full of so many substances. I shoved. All of these substances down my throat without cherry. Hello, everybody. Hello, everybody, and welcome to Spoutmore Mall Brats. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always, playing Fenton Beasley, the slide, Abdul Aziz. Hello, everybody. Welcome to Spoutmore Mall Brats. Was not expecting that in a million years. Playing Franklin Stein, the cutter, Paul Oppers. Hi, everybody.

We're playing Spoutmore Mall Brats today. Playing Clover, Ivy, Fern. Welcome to Spoutmore Mall Brats. The Whisper, Jessica Tai. The Whisper, Clover, Ivy, Fern. Oh, God. Here to bring you all into our world of fantasy. Complete fucking voice chaos. Yeah. You can swear. You don't have to. I didn't know that. That's going to free me up a fucking lot. Shit. So much of his mental bandwidth was censoring himself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. We are continuing our game of World of Blades by Duan Figueroa based on Blades in the Dark by John Harper. When last we left our heroes, the Cool Treat Kids had begun their expedition in the companionship of Adventurer. And we're all jumping to the conclusion. Founder of the Menders, Adric Swift. I'm glad you're on board with that. I'm not. You guys just keep saying it. So I have to lead you down this path so I can twist it and betray you at some point.

They began their expedition into the chocolate factory to recover the dark chocolate so sought after by the vineyard in their attempt to purchase large swaths of mall property and oust the food court. The expedition was sent on its way by a strangely solemn collection of kid gangs. Oh, yeah. And then also the fudgies who we established were older, but they were still there wearing Phantom of the Opera masks after they'd been burned. By hot fudge.

Thanks to the extremely destructive instincts of Clover Ivy Fern many moons ago. Crossing the chocolate river with leaps and bounds, Borbo Borbom Borblo, expedition leader, twisted his ankle and required some medical attention in the form of inebriating gummies. Adric Swift led the children into the candy grass forests. Borbo asleep in the goat cart that would be used to haul the chocolate back out. Yeah.

Before coming upon a group, a tribe, a clan of hobnoblins living in the candy grass forests. Yeah. Apparently related in some way to Raram, the cool tree kid's best friend. Yeah, aka Achilles. Achilles. AKA Achilles. It would seem son of the chieftain and perhaps future chieftain himself. Yeah. Of these hobnoblin peoples. A collection of hobnoblins is called a senate. A senate of hobnoblins. Oh, that's great. Yeah.

Raram was able to, thanks to a group role in which the kids made themselves as pathetic as possible in an attempt to seem non-threatening. Raram was able to talk down his father and his people allowing the cool tree kids and their companions passage through the grasses. We also found out that there is a prophecy about the children coming to save the chocolate factory. Well, there's a prophecy of three divine figures. This is the thing. How many times does this come up?

Does this come up when three people come in here? Yeah. A lot. Literally like three janitors came by the other week and they were like, the prophecy has come true. They have come to clear the toilets. We then found ourselves deep, deep in a bubblegum fog. Lost, blinded by this deliciously sweet smelling mist. Clover used an extremely complicated and borderline magical set of goggles she apparently made when she was like nine years old.

To see through the fog, discovering, unfortunately, a dino sour. Combat was undertaken. Clover directing people, being the only person that could see. It was eventually taken down due to the quick thinking of the cool tree kids and the extreme brutality of our own Franklin Stein. And that is where we find ourselves now. The expedition continues. The bubblegum fog has remained a bit of a hindrance. The bubblegum fog has remained a bit of a hindrance.

But now that the dino sour has been dealt with, Clover at the head is guiding you through the bubblegum fog. It's quiet for a moment. What are you doing? How's everybody feeling about this? You've now seen what life-threatening creatures lurk within this candy forest. I'm feeling pumped. Feeling great. I'm putting some chunks of dino sours into my pockets. Oh my god. I don't know, just as a snack. Do you do it secretly or just in full view? No, I just don't care.

Adric slaps it out of your hands. What? Don't eat the living candy. If you look at it, it's not living. It's literally just chunks of jello. It was trying to kill you moments ago. Yeah, that's not what I meant. Eat or be eaten, bro. Exactly. That's how it works. We're in the jungle, man. We're in the jungle. This is the law of nature. Okay, alright. Well, don't say that I did not warn you because I'm warning you all now. Don't eat anything that you find in this place.

Franklin's eating the grass. He's got dirt that he found that was delicious. There's a worm, a gummy worm he's had. I'm eating the dino sours as we speak. We've come in here and we've eaten quite a bit. Yeah, when shitty food's out of food, like, and we're desperate, we come in here if we have to. Or if shitty food's serving the borscht, we also come in here. I like the borscht. The borscht is just acid-y bullshit. Okay, fine. I eat the borscht and then we come here. Huh. Alright.

And then he pulls up a radish, a candy radish right out of the ground and just starts eating it. Oh, it tastes like cinnamon. Yeah. We hear this . . . Oh, he's not used to it. Oh, no. Excuse me, children. When you get to my age, you get a little bit of indigestion now and then, you know what I mean? It's like drinking the water in Mexico. Like, the locals are fun. Oh, that's true. But you can't do it if you're not from there. I'm not terribly worried about it before.

I've had diarrhea on every continent in this planet. Same. I've shit in nearly every nation to grace the face of this sphere. Yeah, we've done something similar. Have you ever heard of the toilet section of the Home Depot? We're not allowed in there anymore. We invented that. We're actually the reason Home Depot has working bathrooms at all. And you continue on through the fog.

The deeper in you get, the more you're starting to see the actual infrastructure of the chocolate factory inside the jungle. Like, you'll like, pass through a licorice bush section and you'll see like a conveyor belt that moves off into the distance. Still running? Overgrown. There's the pillars holding up parts of this factory. Like, they're disguised as trees. And candy floss hangs off of them. Yeah. I like that a lot. Yeah. Very cool.

And some of the candy, so we're in this like pillar candy tree forest now. It's like getting, like the trees are tall. They're not super close together. It's like they're set very evenly. And the candy floss hangs down and some of it's like overgrown. It's like Spanish moss, like hanging moss from the branches. And it's like knitted together over the years and has created this like semi-impassable area of forest. Hey, unlike that old security guard near the cage.

River, this old man's beard is edible. Well, that answers my question. What do you do? Is your plan to just eat your way through this forest? No. No, we can't stop and eat everything. It'll take us years to get where we're going. That's a good point, Fenton. Maybe let's grab some sticks and see if we can like wind some of this out of the way. And then take it with us. Yeah. Okay. You can light it on fire like torches. Yes. Smart. Oh, I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that.

I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. Oh, it's a beautiful like blue and purple. It changes colors. Yeah. We make torches. Cool. Well, I mean, you're going to have to roll for one. Okay. So this is, I mean, as anything, it's risky. I mean, it's going to take you a long time to like roll up a bunch of stuff enough that you'll get through. And this feels like a tinker too, a group action. Yeah, for sure. Yeah.

It could be a tinker group action. You could, some of you could do roles to set up other people. Like if Clover wanted to do like a tinker, for example. To like. Find some sticks and make little things that would wrap stuff up faster. It could improve, like it would be great effect for Franklin instead of standard effect. You know what I mean? Sure, I'll do that. Yeah. I'll survey to get Clover the implements she needs to make the best possible cotton candy. Okay. Yeah.

So that would make your role controlled. Okay. So you're going to do this role first. Yeah. And if it succeeds, it will be a controlled. Okay. So I'm going to, I'm going to look for the shit. You turn it into cotton candy. No problem. I'm going to be the candy person. And you set it on fire because you're the psycho. All right. You know what? You guys have changed my mind. It's a group action. You can all roll tinker. We'll do it with one. Who's the leader on this? I am. Clover.

Which means you take stress if people fail. Okay. Do you have stress to take? Sure. Uh oh. How many do you? No, because remember we're done if you take too much stress. I have three. So you could. I could take both. Yeah, you could take both. Okay. Okay. But not all three. Okay. Come on guys. Six. Six. Six. I got a four and a five. Okay. Well that's still a critical success. Yes. So you, uh, yeah, you mark two more ticks on your clock. Ooh. So we're at five now?

Uh, yeah, you're at five of eight. We're really moving through this jungle guys. Yeah, we are. Huh. Nothing's going to go wrong from here on out. How could it? Fenton says, and then he stands up on the cart. He stands on Borbo who's still passed out in the cart. He's like, you hear me? Candy factory. Nothing you do. Will ever stop us. Aedric reaches up and grabs you and yanks you off the cart. What are you doing? I am declaring my dominion over this magical forest.

And also I had too much sugar on the way up here. He kneels down as Franklin and Clover are, uh, make like rolling up candy floss into like little torches on sticks. Aedric kneels down in front of Fenton. Fenton. Remember? Yeah. I remember how, uh, like 45 minutes ago, a gummy monster tried to kill all of us. Yes. And we're also being potentially tracked by a dangerous private detective slash Ranger, right? Oh, right.

His very skill set is based on the fact that he's able to move through dangerous and overgrown natural slash magical environments. Well, you keep saying how dangerous it is. That's exactly why I've been leaving this trail of Scotch mints so that we can find our way back to the beginning. We've got this covered. Aedric closes his eyes and stands up. Okay. It is mine. He's like, I'm going to have to fight Shatane. This guy's going to try and kill all of us. All right. Okay. Now I, you know what?

Things are more clear than they were a moment ago. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. I'm going to have to go. So you have your torches? We sure do. Hell yeah. Franklin lit them up. Woof. Franklin, I can't help but notice that you're eating yours. I know that that part's not on fire now, but it will be later. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Let's press on children. Press on.

You carry on traveling through this cotton candy forest just like burning away candy floss as you go with your brand new torches and you're walking for another, I don't know, minutes and you start to hear like water but like thick like thick water rushing in the distance and you get to the base of what does indeed look like a mountain it looks like it is a network of conveyor belts but over time whatever happened whatever chocolate logistical pipes were at the top stuff like tumbled down off the broken and disused conveyor belts and started solidifying and piling up so it's created this mountainous structure there are these cliff sides and uh roosts and peaks clefts valleys all this kind of stuff but sort of miniature yeah it's like an indoor climbing gym made of chocolate yeah exactly and uh the thing that makes it a little difficult is you know the chocolate that you're probably looking for will be at like the mouth of whatever this liquid chocolate fountain is so there is conveyor belts that go up to a point but then they are covered in this running chocolate that is like pushing it back down no so what's your mountaineering expertise like children I have a grappling hook oh yeah pretty good do you do you have a grappling hook don't we all I have a lightning hook it says on my paper yeah you sure do what is a lightning hook um it's just a grappling hook but it's got christmas lights attached to it oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh!

Oh oh oh I For decoration and practicality. It's how people hang their Charles Eve lights. Oh, yeah. I see. All right. Well, that will do. I mean, we've got the one. Perhaps we can all make use of it somehow, but it's going to take us some time to get up this mountain, children. I'm sure you understand. This thing is probably not the most structurally sound, and who knows what the machinery will do when weight is pressed upon it. So, I shall watch you go first. Sorry?

And it's at this time that Borbo, you're all reminded Borbo is here, the goats having pulled him along in the cart all this time. Oh, my gosh. I didn't know that goats were attached. That's so cute. Oh, yeah. You've got two little goats that pull it, and Borbo's like, all right, you guys go. I'm going to hold down the fort down here. And he grabs his backpack and he fishes out the baseball, and he starts swinging it in front of him. Nobody's getting near this fucking cart. Okay.

I'll watch these goats with my fucking life. Would it make sense to send the goats up the mountain first, since A, they're so nimble, and B, you would test the weight? That's smart. That is quite smart. Let's see what the goats do. Okay. I see you rolling dice. What are you rolling? Resolve. Command. You're going to command the goats. Yeah, Mindy gave me these goats, and when she gave them to him, she said, you do whatever this beautiful boy says. Okay.

Yeah, so it's risky and it's limited because these are goats, and they're not. Easy to command. Okay. Four. Four. Okay, so on a risky limited, you still command them, but there is a consequence of some kind. They don't come back. We have to pull the cart out of here. That's hilarious. Oh, yeah. So you see the goats start. They walk towards the chocolate, and they lick the base of it, and then lick the base of it. I shouldn't have said that. Do they also climb up the shaft of it?

They pay special attention to the balls. They start chewing on the chocolate that's at the base of the structure, and they hop up onto a conveyor belt and walk, walk, walk, chew, chew, and you just watch them for, I don't know, probably 10 minutes as they climb up this mountain. Yeah, we kind of forget that this is a tester, and we're like, oh, it's so cute. Oh, look, he made the jump. A natural environment. Look at him go. Their ability to balance is nuts. I know.

It's like they climb up sideways like that. It's so cool. And then we hear, and a giant flying creature comes in and grabs one. A condor? Oh, no. Oh, no. And one grabs the goat and flaps away with the goat into the darkness. And the goat is screaming. And you, yeah, all right, that happens. So now I'm going to go ahead and start another clock real quick. Clover hates it. She's like. I don't want an animal to die. I can't believe this. I'm supposed to be a vegan. I shouldn't even be using goats.

This is what you get for using beasts of burden. And in the distance, you hear like, as it sounds like there's a crash in a candy tree, and it sounds like the goat has been deposited in a nest nearby. Okay. Still alive. Yeah. Freaked out in a tree. But then you hear like. Oh, no. As it starts coming back around. What do you do? I have lights out licorice. Can I throw it at the goat and shroud in darkness? I might need that for a fight. And that's also not what lights out licorice does.

Careful, children. When fight facing an enemy capable of taking to the skies, you have to take special care. Do something. All right, fine. And as it. Swoops down at you. It's feathers. Yeah. Look like that. Like rainbow candy tape stuff. And its beak is. Saltwater taffy. Saltwater taffy. But like hardened on the edges. Like it's stale. Saltwater. Saltwater taffy. And it's got talons of shining. Werther's. Oh, yeah. That's ugly. No, it's Werther's. Okay, fine. Butterscotch talons. Yeah.

Butterscotch talons. And you. Say. Do something to Aedric. And he goes. Oh, okay. And he puts a foot up on the cart. And leaps into the air. Whoa. As it swoops at you. And he grabs one of its talons. Holy shit. And he's just hanging from this bird as it flies away. Whoa. And he's like swiping his sword at it. Like. How about me, beast? Ha ha ha. This is awesome to watch. Now that is something. And he is carried off into the darkness, basically. And you hear. Gah. Gah. Gah. Gah. Gah.

And swipes up. Ha ha ha ha. He's fighting a condor in a tree somewhere. Bite me. I'll bite you. You're delicious. You think he's going to be dropped off with the goat? This is a stance to reason. Gah. Nice. Um. Now we're alone. Borba. What's going on, kids? Borba. The adult that was with us that wasn't drunk is gone. So we need you to be the adult that's with us that's drunk. Okay. Okay. All right. Well, here I am. And he like lifts himself out of the cart and tumbles on the ground. And yeah.

So you're just, you're at the bottom of this chocolate mountain. There's a goat up there. So here's my question. Yeah. So this whole mountain is the dark chocolate that they're going to. Oh no, it's not. So it is made of chocolate, but it's not this entire, like the chocolate that if this was all it was, if there was this much of it, it would be a non-issue. Yeah. So whatever this pipe is, that's bursting all this chocolate out, probably crusted around the mouth.

The mouth of the pipe is like the finest, darkest, most layered chocolate. So that's the stuff is like the gunk that dries. Yeah. That's so gross. Rich people like gross stuff. Yeah. They like the most rotten of cheeses. Foie gras. Yeah. This is the foie gras of chocolates. Yeah. And the pipes at the top of this mountain. Yeah. It's going to be a real job to clean the rim of that pipe. Oh God. Yeah. It's some kind of rim job. God, we're going to have to rim this pipe.

So the clock on the rim job starts now. Okay. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I mean, the other clock looks like a butthole. Yeah, it is. The clock to even get to the chocolate is not yet filled. All right. I know. We have to like hike this thing. You got to climb and then you got to find the actual pipe. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Let's go up there and get this rotten chocolate. Okay. Candy cane, ice picks. Let's get up. Oh, smart. What is this? Like a prowess kind of like group effort sort of thing.

Yeah. I'll do the lead climb. What's that called? Yeah. Yeah. Right. I'll set in candy things and then we'll have the licorice rope and we'll try and climb up like that. That's awesome. Yeah. I'm linking us all up in like the little toddler leash. Right. Yes. Yes. Perfect. Franklin's in the front, Fenton's in the back. You know what? My ankle's still kind of like, honestly, I'm not drunk anymore, but my ankle's pretty messed up. I really shouldn't follow you. I don't want to pull you all down.

Okay. Watch my bag. I will. I'm going to watch this cart with my life. I'm going to get the goat back down here when you get up there. Oh yeah. He's up there. Yeah. Okay. So group action. Yes. And Franklin is leading it. Yup. In finesse. Okay. In finesse. Okay. Right. Five and six. Oh. Four. Six. That's a critical success. Nice. How many boxes do we get? Two? Yeah. You get two. One more and we're there. And Fenton, as Franklin is climbing. He's climbing. I give you the!

I give you the give you give give give give give give give give give give give give give And you kept hearing me go, whoa, what a climb this is. A mighty mountain for me to overcome. Oh, more sweat on my brow. Sure, like talking a lot for somebody who's like climbing as hard as we are. As you climb up this desperate mountain, it's like cliffhanger. Like you grab onto a ledge and a bunch of chocolate crumbles away. One hand swinging with the canyon swinging below. Hanging by one hand.

A condor cries in the distance, illuminating how far up you are right now. The wind is getting cold. The oxygen is getting thin this high off the ground. And it's mostly just because you're breathing in a lot of chocolate fumes. But you get to the goat and it looks very, it's just staring at you with its like sideways hourglass eyes. Can I convince it to go down? So with your critical success, you actually get to the goat and you, then you step forward.

And your foot crunches through some chocolate. And hits a button on some sort of disused conveyor belt that all spin to life. It is basically a perfect little river of conveyor belts back to the bottom. Oh, sick. So the goat just gets on it and just like rides back and forth. And then is deposited safely at the base of the mountain. Nice. Perfect. I did it, guys. Amazing job. And you hear, I mean, like it did, it cleared a bit of a path. Which is nice because chocolate would like break off.

But after a while, you're like. And all the conveyor belts stop. I don't know. But the goat is safely at the bottom of the mountain. That's great. And Borbo yells up. Great job. Hello, everybody. And welcome to Clover's quiet meditation room. I'm about to play for you the sound of majestic ocean waves. Look inside you. What do you see? Nothing. That's right. You're an empty void, a blank canvas upon which a masterpiece will be painted. My masterpiece. I'm Grefg Swooshlin.

From the Grefg Swooshlin Academy for the Arts in Marshall College. Do you have what it takes to forge your body into a weapon of war and a work of art? There's only one way to find out. When I tell you. Now accepting students for the class of 384. Howdy, folks. Are you looking for a story based podcast to get lost in? Then you might love Dungeons and Randomness. We're a team of three. We're a D&D actual play podcast with over 14 years of incredible stories under our belts.

We have one of the most friendly and welcoming communities on the planet who will help you get caught up. Our latest arc, Frostborn, was created for new listeners in mind. So if you're ready for the adventure of your lives, check out Dungeons and Randomness wherever you get your podcasts. Attention shoppers. Uh. Would the owner of a dusky red stallion please return to the parking garage? Your horse is kicking in several windows. Well, that was the wrong bottle, so I apologize for that.

I'll try that again next time. See you later. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. The chocolate waterfall is rushing beside you. This is sort of the last leg of you getting to the chocolate is finding a way to ascend this chocolate waterfall safely. But this rich, ancient, milky, thick chocolate coursing all around you. What do you do? I mean, I eat some.

Yeah, take a cup of it. Yeah. I just like putting your mouths in the waterfall. Yeah. Yeah. This is what it's all about. Fenton is like, I'm pretty sure. Your running chocolate never expires. That's what I heard. Yeah. And you get your little grubby mitts in there. And what? Just like scoop it into your mouth? Shove your whole head in the thing? I shove it all. Shove my face in. I shove it all. Yeah. And this is the best chocolate you've ever tasted in your life. Yeah.

We all feel like 35 year old women. Yeah. It's like subtle notes of like blackberry in there. Caramel. Caramel. It's like somebody's truly listening. It's like somebody's listening to me. It's like I know what the word facetious means. Oh my God. Fenton, what do you taste? Yeah, he takes a cup of it and he's like, oh my God, I have to see the Taj Mahal. God, I really want to eat, pray, and love right now. I get it now. Yoga is not just an exercise. It's a way of life.

Oh, wait, can we use this as an opportunity to get in the vineyard's heads? Yeah. Totally, yeah. Oh my God, yeah. To get a little insight on how they're going to react to like what we're doing. Totally. Sure. A tune. A tune. A tune, yeah. A tune, yeah. Group action for a tune. I have two in a tune. So wait, is it possible that they use this not just to sell chocolate, but they use it as some sort of psychic medium? We haven't rolled the dice yet. Oh my God. You don't know for sure? Here we go.

Okay. Let's do it. Six. Two sixes. Whoa. Holy shit. Okay, so whoever led that takes a point of- I led it. Okay, so you take a point of stress. How many points of stress can you take before you're out? Two more. Okay, that's not too bad. I'm at two more too. Yeah. So your minds are flooded with the smug, peaceful surety of a wealthy 30-something. Yeah. Like, my retirement- My retirement's taken care of. I have no problems. I own my own house. All these things.

Did my grandpa give me a quarter million dollar loan? Yes, he did. Sure. That still makes me- That still- You know, it doesn't mean I'm not a self-made woman. It just means this vegan pizza restaurant that I started is incredibly successful. Because of the- On top of the inheritance from my grandfather, my parents also loaned me $100,000. Yeah. Which doesn't mean I'm not a self-made woman. Yeah. I'm not a self-made woman. I made my parents give me that loan. Totally.

I spent it all on Instagram influencers eating my fucking pizza. And now I'm an Instagram influencer because I don't really have to work. Yeah. And I teach other- I get people to pay me to tell them how to be Instagram influencers. Yes. I'm a life coach slash marketing guru. Slash entrepreneur. Yeah. And now I have almost 300 followers. Yeah. Free followers. Okay. So what are you guys trying to do with this? Okay. Attuning to the chocolate. Yeah. We're trying to get in the vineyard's heads.

We're telling each other, we notice we're thinking like the wine moms. Yeah. Yeah. We're like wondering if this is doing more than just, like it seems to be tapping us into some- Oh, certainly. Right? Yeah. Absolutely. What else could they be wanting other than just selling it and building condominiums? They want it. This is for power. Yeah. This is for power. It's like more evil than condos. They're trying to fucking change the culture of the mall to be more like them? This is to influence.

Yeah. So if they feed people this stuff and they hear the wine moms ideas, it's going to stick harder. Oh my God. They're gentrifying chocolate. Oh my gosh. This is how they'll gentrify. We thought it stopped at the condos. It doesn't. Oh, it's not- But the condos are just part of it. The condos are so they have somewhere to put all the people that are listening to them. Exactly. The condos are a conduit for the chocolate. Whoa. Yeah. Conduit minimums. Uh-huh. That's where it comes from. Oh.

They're conduits for change. So not only do we have to steal this dark chocolate, but we do have to fucking destroy this pipe. I guess. You have to end this source of chocolate. Holy shit. Okay. We need to find the source. The sticks have never been more chocolate. All right. Now you've got this last stretch to go. Whatever you do, however you succeed, you will be able to reach the top of this mountain. But yeah. How do you ascend? We're not at the top. I thought we were at the top.

You're pretty close to the top. The waterfall basically hits where you are right now and then goes down the mountain further. So there's just a little bit of the good chocolate here. Yeah. This is a good chocolate. This is a good chocolate. This is just the milk. This is just the liquid chocolate coming out of the pipe. The actual expensive dark chocolate that the wine moms want. Remember. It's a little bit of the good chocolate because we just ate it. No.

We drank the liquid chocolate, but we're trying to get that dirty rim chocolate. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. So the rim chocolate is the valuable chocolate that they'll sell. Yeah. And the liquid chocolate is this influential chocolate. Maybe there's another pipe that comes out like lower and it pumps out like white chocolate to dilute it. Oh, yeah. That's why we have milk chocolate everywhere else. Yeah. Totally. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. So we have to stop this source of like super dark.

The magic chocolate. The magic chocolate that makes people into a bunch of fucking Julia Robertses. Uh-huh. So that means we're going to have to like climb into the pipe or something. Could be. Or blow it up. Can we blow shit up? Yeah. Can we clog it forever? Oh, yeah. I am an expert in that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Clogging and unclogging suddenly is my business. I wonder if we need Adric's help for this.

Uh, yeah, you might, but you still hear like, oh no, I will kill you, you stupid fucking bugger. And I'm going to get that gut back too. We might have to deal with this on our own. Okay. He led you here. That's true. But now you've got to take it, take it to the end zone.

I give you the give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give I think it's sort of like a sheer cliff a bit.

Stop you from being able to climb up. If we Super Gilbert. Oh, shit. Mr. Gilbert. Master Gilbert. Master Gilbert. All three of us. All three of us. That's true. This is what it's all been for. This is what it's all been for. The signs all point to this moment. I shed a tear. All right. Master Gilbert. And Fenton's like, and this time he pulls the blonde wig out of his backpack. And he's like, Clover, I want you to be the top. I'll do it. Give me that wig. And I put it on.

And like a wind breeze like blows through my hair. You can save a few lives. And Fenton and Franklin are like, oh, my fucking God. All right. She looks like my auntie Warhol. All right. Master Gilbert. So this is a group action, clearly. It's a group action. It's a group action. What is this? It's finesse again, obviously. So this is controlled. Yeah. Most likely. And I'll lead it this time. And it'll be a standard effect. You will get to the top. And I will be on the bottom.

This is the sacrifice that I make. How does that? How does Franklin's legs even not touch the ground? You know what? He's got his huge backpack. He's basically. He's sitting on the backpack. I love that. It's really like holding him up. Yeah. Amazing. Amazing. I just want to put out there. Are we sure that we don't want Franklin to lead it? Because I have so many empty stresses. Yeah. I mean, Franklin can still lead it. He is in the middle. Yeah. You lead it. And I have three die. Yeah.

This is finesse? Yeah. Yeah. Finesse. Great. Six. Five and two. Five. Okay. So six. So it's just a success. Yeah. But that's great. Master Gilbert. The trench coat comes out, wraps around all three kids. We see tiny little, tiny, tiny. Legs at the bottom of the trench coat. Really fat thighs. Really tiny little legs. And then a blonde girl's face at the top. And then. Wild dark hair underneath the blonde. Yeah.

And then six arms emerge from the trench coat and grip onto the cliff side and start climbing. Master Centipede. And Clover gets to the top first, grips onto the edge. With all my yoga strength. Pull us up. Yeah. It's all in the fingertips. It is. Yeah. Fenton feels himself lifting up the ground so much. You're doing it. And Clover pulls herself over. And then Franklin's next. His hands grip the edge. Reach down. Grab the back. The top loop of the backpack. That's how I'm being lifted up.

Fenton comes up over the edge as well. Yep. Making this sound. And you all finally crest the top. The peak of chocolate. Mountain. And we're still in the Mr. Gilbert. I can see everything. Yeah. You can. You can see out for mile around. Oh, it's like Jurassic Park. We see a herd of sour dino sour. Dino sour. Yeah. It's true. They do move in herds. It almost looks peaceful. Yeah. And then we see Adric Swift. Like. Yeah. Go. Aren't like arm around the neck of a car. Condor punching it in the eyes.

Is he in the nest with the goat? That'd be so funny. The goat's doing nothing. Just. He's in the nest now. And yeah, there's a goat. You can see. Cause I mean, like, it's weird how space seemed warped while you were traveling through the factory. It's not that big. It's not that big. Like, you can see all the kids that waited, that left you at the other side. It's like the size of like winner's home sense. Yeah. It seems like a big play place. Yeah. And yeah, you see Adric.

At the top of a tree in a candy nest made out of like hickory sticks. The only savory thing you've seen so far, but delicious. Cool. And yeah, he's punching the shit out of this bird. Yeah. And he's going, you will not have Deborah the goat, you. Stand fast, Deborah. I'm here for you. And he dispatches the bird with a mighty blow. It's candy beak goes. Well, it goes. Cause it's saltwater taffy. I forgot. Part of it snaps off and the rest kind of slaps. Yeah. And then it just slops to the side.

And the bird goes and falls for what feels like an eternity, but isn't because the tree is like seven and a half feet tall. And then boom, disappears into the forest floor. And Adric turns and sees you and he points and he gives you a salute. We salute back. Well done, children. Thank you. These next steps you must take alone. And you don't hear him say alone. You hear. You hear him. Those last steps you must take. I think he said alone. So we're here now. Okay. Is the pipe right there?

Tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink. It's a little bit of a walk. It's like you're in a cleft basically of chocolate. Like it's piled up around you. Yeah. There's a couple of mounds on the other side. There's a couple of crevice in the middle. There's a couple of round mounds. Yeah. And a pipe in the middle. Very middle. Jesus, Sean, grow up. That was not my plan, but it's pretty funny.

But the chocolate is like burbling out of a pipe and then it's like flowing down to where the waterfall is and crusted around the pipe. You see the darkest, hardest, it's like rock hard chocolate. Wow. Rimming. The hole. We're so mature. What have we done? I don't know. But there's the chocolate. There it is right there. All right, everybody. Empty your pockets. Okay. We got to figure out what we can fucking clog this thing with. Okay. Okay.

Also, we got to get that fucking dark chocolate on the rim. Yeah. We got to take all of it off. Yeah. We got to wipe it clean. Yeah. Can't leave any bits or debris around here or we're going to get sick. Yeah. No danglers. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. No. What? No. Man, this stuff will not fall off. So I got candy knuckles and I'm punching off the rim. And I have emptied out my backpack and I'm trying to catch everything in there. Okay. Yeah.

So this sounds like people are doing individual stuff. Okay. Yeah. So I guess wreck maybe would make the most sense for Franklin. So this is risky, but it'll be standard success. You'll get the stuff. Okay. Six and five. Holy shit. Now you break off every bit of chocolate around the edge of this pipe. And it's so tempting to just eat it. I know. I really want to. Should we try it? No. We could try it. Yeah. You could try it. Yeah.

Well, let me collect it all up and then I'll grab some small pieces for us. Yeah. Totally. Okay. Just do a little bit. Yeah. You're collecting the chocolate? Yeah. I think I'm going to use survey to look at all the places where it lands and collect it up. Okay. You don't have to roll to pick stuff up off the ground. Oh. Oh, really? Yeah. But if you want to, you can. I just don't know why you would. Well, do we have enough room in our bags to bring it all? I guess not that much.

It's not that much. It's maybe on the outside. Like 20 pounds worth. Way less than 20 pounds. No. Wow. No. No. No. 20 pounds. More than 20. It's 50 pounds. Yeah. It's 50 fucking pounds. Yeah. All right. Now you're dealing with 50 pounds of chocolate. Well, I hauled 50 pounds of shit up this mountain. That's true. Actual shit. Oh, yeah. How are we going to get the rest of the shit down? Oh. Well. I was going to. It's almost like I tried to give you an out with a small amount of chocolate.

Thanks for trying, Sean. Hey, you know what? I do what I can. Well, what I was thinking is I would leave all the shit that I brought up here. And we can use it to clog that pipe. Yeah. I also have pop rocks. Oh, shit. So we can use all the stuff and then just load it around there. Yeah. And then blow it the fuck up. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I'm using survey to find the best way to clog and destroy the pipe. Okay. There we go. Or study. We need to do that. Study. Study. Okay.

So that's risky as everything is here. And standard effect. Five, two, and one. Five. Okay. So that is a partial success. Success with consequence. You look around. And the best. Like. This is a pretty normal pipe. The pipes themselves are coated in chocolate. So that's not the best way. Like destroying the pipe itself would be difficult. But if you were able to jam something that doesn't melt in there, that would probably be the best way. Yeah. I mean, I have a bunch of finery.

I brought all of my costumes. That's what was in my bag. That's fair. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You do. You have tons. I brought with me the spandex satchel. Oh, shit. You diff. My bag of holding. Uh-huh. I could stretch it out. Over the. Over the thing. Yeah. Spandex is not breathable. Yeah. So we could cram all the fenton stuff. And this could act like a big plug. Yeah. Does anyone. Oh, you have gum. Don't you have some kind of gum net? I have lots of gum. What if we all chew a bunch of gum? Yeah.

A bubble net. Yeah. You have the bubble net. So if we chew it and spit it on there, it will make it so sticky. Yeah. Uh-huh. We're so smart. Amazing. So smart. What a brilliant plan. So Clover sticks a handful of gum in her mouth and starts aggressively chewing. Yeah. Fenton, too. Yeah. All wrong. I'm not. I'm not. And he's stuffing all his shit in the pipe. Guys, I swallowed my gum. I need more gum. Here's more in the back. And Fenton takes a handful out of his mouth and shoves it in.

You're a good man. So you're all shoving a bunch of gum into this pipe and hoping that nothing terrible happens to you. We're shoving the finery in. Yeah. And then we're like putting the spandex bag. Over top. And then we're using the gum to stick it in place. Like a wax seal around it. Yeah. Okay. This sounds like a group action. Okay. Yeah. For wreck, I suppose. Oh, yeah. Totally. I just get one. Who's leading? Franklin. Franklin. Franklin's reading. Okay. We're leading. Yeah. Six. Two. Two.

So you're like, you're helping them. You know, they start to slow down and you grab their jaws and you're working their jaws for them. Slamming their mouths open and closed like puppets. Yeah. Yeah. Chew like the wind, children. I'm acting like Adrian. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Reaching into their mouths and pulling the gum out and shoving more in. Jamming their jaws open and closed. Because they're like, I can't chew anymore. Like chew damn you. I got you old friend.

Fenton's like, my head hurts so much. I've never chewed so much in my life. Rest there, my sweet boy. All the foods I like are puddings. It's so hard to chew. My jaw muscles aren't that developed yet. I eat mostly goo. But you know, after a few, after a while of whirlwind chewing, you've prepared enough gum to seal the pipe shut for good. And you hear like, from the pipe, but everything seems fine for now. Wait, did we already put it on there? Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah.

No, it's, it's all been sealed. It's all been sealed. You're good to go. Okay. You've got the chocolate too. You've got the dark chocolate. Oof. We gotta get this thing out of here before Chathane shows up. That's true. We gotta hurry back down. Yeah. Okay. Let's take the conveyor belt. Oh yeah. So you gotta walk. So you have to get down the chocolate cliff first, which is relatively simple. It's not that high. I just fall down. Okay. You're gonna take some harm for that.

You don't just get to decide. What? I mean, you could use your armor technically. I'm gonna use my armor. Okay. Then you use your armor and you just slam into the ground. I'm fine. Yep. Oh, cool. Just then Franklin falls forward. All right. With his armor. You're gonna take a point. Then you're marking off your armor as well. What? Just one armor there? Yep. And Fenton has the backpack, so he tries… I'll jump. So everybody jumps down to slam into the ground. It's kind of soft.

It's chocolatey, so it's not like landing on concrete or anything. But it's eight feet to the conveyor belt, right? Yeah. Yeah. Wham. Yeah. And then he goes… He's like, all right, I'm gonna do it too. And then he goes to do it and then freaks out and then twists and grabs. Oh no. He's not strong enough, so he slides down and scrapes the shit out of us. Because he hesitated. That's the thing. In his fingernail. Oh God.

If he just fell, it would have been better, but he hesitated and it made it worse. Then yeah, you mark off your armor. Yeah. What a great use of all your armors. Oh, we don't get to use armor from here on in? Nope.

So you get back to the cart, you walk down the conveyor belts, the goat cleared conveyor belts and you get to the cart with Borbo in it while leaning against the cart with his baseball bat next to one of the goats and then Aedric comes striding out of the candy trees with a goat under his arm and he's bloodied. He's like cut up. He's got candy stuck to him like some melted butterscotch on his neck. A necklace of butterscotch talons. Yeah. Cool. Well done, children. You've done it.

You, I mean, I assume you did it? Yeah, we got it. Way to go. And we stopped the flow of the dark chocolate coming out. Oh, you stopped up a pipe up there. Yeah, we stuffed it full of stuff and sealed it off. Yeah. I'm going to assume that you had a reason. Yeah, we did, because we figured out when we were up there, we drank some of that chocolate, and it made us into a bunch of fucking Karens.

And we wanted to gentrify the mall and stuff, and we thought it was a good idea, and we figured out that that's what the wine moms are going to do. They're going to use this, they were going to use that liquid chocolate to try and convince everyone that gentrification is a good thing. But we got rid of it, and we also stole the dark chocolate. And the chocolate gave you a vision. It did. He looks up at the peak of the chocolate mountain. Don't be tempted by the dark visions it offers.

I would never. I am, and Adric puts up his hand. High five him. And he seems to, he puts up his hand, and he is quiet, and he seems to cock an ear. And you see his, the little hint of an elven upturn in his ear, like his ear twitches. Oh, right, he's an elf. Half elf, yeah. What? Quiet. Do you have a question? There's something in the trees. Is it more harm than a lens? It's worse. A wick. And he draws his sword and turns and strikes an arrow out of the air. Holy shit! Cool.

And it spirals off into the distance. It says, run, children! Which way? We all scatter, different directions. I jump into the river. Oh, no. And he runs. He's into the trees. So cool. Wow. And Borbo's like, oh, oh, no! Grab the goats! Grab the goats! The chocolate! I've got the chocolate in my backpack. Okay, and Borbo grabs one of the, he grabs both the goats under his arms, and he starts limping down the trail. Go, go, go!

But yeah, Borbo is like limping into the tree pillars, all of the girders that are holding up the roof. Yeah, and Fenton is running so hard. 50 pounds. 50 pounds of dark chocolate on his back. Oh, my gosh. Clover's doing backstrokes down the chocolate river, and she hops out. Oh, my God. There's a murderer after us. Okay, so here's what we're going to do. Here's how chases typically work in Blades in the Dark.

So I've got a six-segment clock called get away, and then I've got a six-segment clock called get caught. Cool. And as you're trying to get away… Oh, I was going to say, we'll take the… The get away clock, please. I was thinking the same thing. One for a get away clock. Yeah, we'll take that one. Yeah, so get away is the clock you're trying to fill, and as you fail, the other one will fill. Okay, fine. So you're trying to race the clock to the end of the clock. Here we go.

So what are you doing? We're running away. Rolling dice. Just rolling randomly. I don't know. Okay, so keep in mind, there are multiple ways you can do this. Let's talk about all of them. You guys have played this game a bit. You tell me what your options are for how rolls might go. Risky standard. Risky risky. Desperate. Desperate risky. Desperado. So those are kinds of rolls, yes, except for desperado.

So because you're being chased by a very skilled ranger, your rolls are going to be desperate, and your effects will start off as limited. Okay. So how you can do this is you can just take those chances, and you can do a group action, which would give you a greater chance of succeeding in filling the clock by one. There's only one problem. We all went in different directions, because that was funny. Right, I forgot. So we'll have to come back together.

Yeah, Clover jumped in the river, and Fenton ran for the grass. What did you do? Franklin went over to the cart to gather more weapons. Okay. Oh, so you're still in the cart then? Yeah, I went to the cart. And Borbo ran into the trees with the goats. Oh, so Franklin's alone. Okay, so this first roll will be a group action. It will not be for the clock, but it will be all of you trying to find each other again. And then we will talk about how this clock might work.

I'm following chocolate bubbles in the river trying to find Clover. Oh, right, okay. So what do we think that this will be? Like, what action are you guys going to use for your group action? Survey? To look around and find each other? Okay. Like, we're looking around, we're listening for our voices. Yeah, I like that. So because you guys are just trying to find each other, this is risky instead of desperate. I think it's still desperate. Everything's going to be desperate.

Desperate, but this will be standard. If you succeed, you will find each other. Okay. So no matter what, when we're desperate, we have to take an experience point? Have to. What? Yes, you get to. I don't know. It's hard to tell whether we like experience or not. Okay, wait, no, hold on. So who's leading this group action? Who's going to take the stress if people don't succeed?

I mean, I'm at the cart, so I was going to take the cart, like, try and grab Clover and, like, bring the cart to us so we can try and get it. And we have a shield going. That's true, but also we're at the top of a hill. Like, there's, like, a series of hills that go up to the cliff. This is amazing. So you can roll the cart and then jump into it like a shot, like a, like, like Bamarjera. Carts of Darkness? Yeah. Yes. Ride it backwards? Hell yeah. Yeah, right, right down the hill.

I like this a lot. Okay, so it sounds like… I'm using my sneakers. I have these sneakers to, like, turn. You're, like, dragging my feet behind me. I just got that Carts of Darkness joke. That's really funny. So it's, so it's, uh, you're leading it then. Franklin's leading it. Yeah. Okay, great. So Franklin will take the stress if you don't succeed. Great. Here we go. Survey! Survey! Oh, no, I dropped one. I got two fives. I got four. Do I roll this again? Yeah, you can roll it again.

Doesn't matter. I got two sixes. Holy shit, that's a critical. Two sixes is a critical. Wow. Does that mean we fucking kill it? Maybe that means that you do, you'll fill one tick on getaway. Yes! Sick! So Franklin pushes the cart all the way to the top of the chocolate foothills at the base of Chocolate Mountain. Yeah. It's the Big Rock Candy Mountain. Oh! Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I've been… The streams of you who come a-dragging down the rock.

There is a, there's a hobnoblin with a banjo, like… Bing-a-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding. Bing-a-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding. There's three hobnoblins in prison outfits all chained together, running, and then they drop down when the foreman turns his head. The other one goes, ran-ran-ran-ran, but in him, they, they, they R-U-N-O-F-T. They run out. Damn, we're in a tight spot. Ran-ran-ran-ran.

All right, so Franklin pushes, pushes the cart up the foothills of Big Rock Candy Mountain and hops in and what, yells out to Clover and Fenton? Hold on, dude, we're headed for the rhubarb patch. And you roll down. There's no goats steering this thing. You're just riding in it. Oh, yeah, no, I've got, you know when the yoke comes forward, I've got it in my hands coming backwards into the cart and trying to steer a little bit from there. Yeah. Totally. And you're rolling. I'm using my shoes.

Yeah, also using your, like, physicality to, like, ride it. And my shoes on the, on the, on the rock behind me. Yeah. And Fenton and Clover, what, you, like, do you hear them coming? You go and grab on to the cart? Yeah, we hear a loud metal crane trundling. Yeah. And I yell, oh, we're in a tight spot. And I, uh, I see, like, sparks flying coming towards me. Mm-hmm. And my savior in his chariot is running. The chariots of fire?

A stride, the chariot, hair, uh, not billowing because it's pretty short, but, you know, hair in the wind. So cool. Looking like a fucking, like, majestic prince. Yeah. Totally. And you guys grab on and the cart continues, oh, wait, Fenton. Oh, he's in the path of the cart, so it just hits him. And he just grips him up. He just, he just, like, like, like one of those Garfield stuffies that you'd stick to the windows of cars. Pull him in. And the cart carries on through the trees.

And if you were to, if you look to the right, if you were to look to the right, you would see two figures darting in and out of the trees. Oh, cool. You hear, like, clang, clang. Describe this. We're watching it. Yeah, you see a figure in a dark leather gherkin and, uh, and a broad buttermoth silk cloak duck low and dodge back, hop backwards into the air and let loose, like, two arrows. At the same time? Yeah. Two?

Well, actually, no, it's, it's, it's two arrows individually, but you hear, like, like, he draws and fires that quickly. And then you hear, like, clang, clang as a sword whips up from the other figure and knocks them out of the air. Yeah. And dodges, like, lunges forward and the dodge, the other rolls out of the way. And they're just, like, hopping off trees, lunging at each other. So cool. Keep describing it. I'm loving this. Sean, you're doing a great job. Uh, okay, what do we got?

What else happens? Use the environment. Shathane takes another shot with the arrow and then spins his bow up over his head and brings it down in two hands like a weapon, like a staff. And he's blocking sword blows from Adric. So cool. And Adric gets in close, just grabs him by the vest and headbutts him. And stumbles a little bit because he hit him way too hard with his own skull. Yeah. All right.

And now you've got to decide what you're doing because you see Shathane look in your direction and reach for his quiver. Uh, Fenton takes his little dick out and pisses at him. Okay, that does nothing. You are stuck to the front of a cart. It's like trying to get your dick out on the Gravitron. You can't move. And let me tell you, getting your dick out on the Gravitron is nigh on impossible. Sean has tried many times. And failed.

You know how much it costs to bribe the carny to let you go on the Gravitron alone? Yeah, that's key here. I was by myself. Except for the carny. He was there too. To supervise. But he said that he wouldn't look and I took him at his word. Yeah, it was for science. Yeah. All right. So what's the next role here? Okay, this is what we were going to say. Now that you're on the cart, it's more risky. You're in movement. Right.

So you can either do a group action, which will mean that you're all just going to take the position and effect as they stand, risky limited. The other option is Fenton and Clover can do what are called setup actions. Which are individual actions that would improve the positioning and effect of roles that say Franklin as the driver might take.

So you could be like Clover could put her goggles on as a setup action as like a survey and then direct Franklin, which would potentially make it controlled standard. Do we do individual roles for these? Setup actions, yes. But instead of you guys doing things directly, you would be preparing Franklin to do things. Okay. Let's see. So I'm putting my mask back on. Mm-hmm. So we'll see through the fog that's quickly approaching. Mm-hmm. And survey. Yeah, survey I think would work. To look out.

Yeah. So survey, it's going to be risky standard. Yeah, normal. Okay. Six and a three. God damn. You guys are rolling hot tonight. I don't think you've actually failed a role so far. So you're just, I imagine you just like wide stance on top of the cart with your goggles like go this way. There's a family of dinosaurs that way so we want to take the right. I love that. Perfect. Right turn. Like a rally car. Rally car, yeah. Yeah.

When they have that person just with a clipboard that's like hard left, soft left, go straight, turn now. Like really good specific like 40 degrees southwest. What? Yeah. Muscle memory doing a really. That's so cool. Yeah. Okay. And what's Fenton trying to do? Fenton, he's like clambered into the cart. Good. And. Pants down. Now his dick's out. Sean. And then, he stands at the edge and he goes, ra ra to us. And he's trying to call, he's trying to call the hobnoblins to help them. Amazing.

All right. So what are you rolling? I'm using consort. Perfect. Yep. I'm mostly risky but this would be great effect because if you call ra ra to you and the hobnoblins, that's a huge boon. Yeah. So you will get what you want. Yeah. In spades. Which is for them to like run interference and attack Shathane, I guess. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. Four. So we're going to go ahead and fill in two of the get caught segments. No! Those were failures. That's unfair. No, it's a risky. That's the consequence.

Fucking fuck. Wow. And it still works, keep in mind. But you only get ra ra, I think. Oh, shit. Oh, and he comes in on a swing and then. Yeah, he swings in on a live wire. Like a blue raspberry live wire. Okay. Off a nearby tree. And you, ra ra to me. Ra ra. Ra ra. And now he's on the cart. Yeah. Ra ra, we need your help. Ra. That guy in the, in the green gherkin, he's trying to stop us from getting the hot, the dark chocolate out of here.

And ra ra looks over and he remembers Shathane because he was surveilling Shathane. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And he goes, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra. And he dives off the cart and just tumbles into a bush. Yeah. He might be, he might be gone. He might be dead. He's just dead in a bush.

But as you're looking, you look over at where ra ra dove and Shathane, you see him like skid to a halt, duck under a sword swing from Adric and an arrow comes out and shoots out between the trees and hits the wheel of the cart. Shit. And it starts like hitting, like the shaft of the arrow is hitting the ground. Like mechanically, the mechanisms and the ground. Yeah, the cart's like, chunk, chunk, chunk, chunk, chunk. Can I bend down and try to take the arrow out? Absolutely.

It's going to be very risky, but with a standard effect, if you can get it out, it'll solve this. And can I aid her by holding her legs? Yeah, absolutely. So you would take a stress and she would get plus one. So I probably want to do finesse. Do you fill out your stress thing? No, not on this one, but I will. It's okay. I'll have two if you don't do it. Are you sure you don't? It looks like it's full. No, there's one more left. Okay. But is it as soon as I fill it out? Yeah, done. I'm done.

Toast. Okay. All right. So what are you using to do this? I think finesse makes sense. Yeah, finesse to time it to grab the arrow. God, I hope you get a six and that wasn't for nothing. Ooh, there better be a six in here. Oh, yeah. Two sixes and a four. Holy shit! Wow. Okay, so. Fuck yeah! Critical! Yeah. So we're going to call that in a combination of Fenton and Clover's actions there, that is an additional setup action, which will make the Franklin's next roll a controlled great. Awesome.

Which means you're in a great position right now. You're very safe in this movement because Clover's watching. The wheel is clear of arrows. Shathane is being kept busy by Adric. And it sounds like ran, ran now. You hear, ran! You hear, what the fuck? Which is very unusual to hear Shathane shout out while on the hunt. Yes. Which means he was really surprised by ran, ran. Whatever the fuck he did. He did. Yeah. He did something fucked up. It was bad.

So Franklin, you are free and clear to make your, your move. Are we in the fog yet? The fog is rapidly approaching. You see the bubble gum. I steer into it as fast as I can because if we can't see, he can't see. True. Absolutely true. So wait, what are you rolling? I'm going to roll finesse. Right, yeah. And prowess. Okay. So controlled great here. Oh, 3, 3, 2. Jesus Christ. I would like to do a devil's bargain.

So devil's bargain, remember is you get a plus one die, but something bad happens regardless. Okay. I would like somebody to aid me. Can I aid him? Yeah. How many stress can you take? I have two available. I'll take one. Give him one. I'm going to give him one. Okay. You get one more or you can take a devil's bargain and roll two more. I'll take a devil's bargain. So what's the bad thing that's going to happen regardless? Rara gets murdered. Oh no. I was going to say Adrian gets murdered.

I was like, no. I was like, no. Where's Borbo? I know. Oh. Still on his own. That's bad. Yeah. He didn't meet up with us. Borbo mystery. He obviously didn't run back the way you came. No. Okay. Borbo is out in the wind. That's the bad thing. That's the bad thing. You're not going to get back with Borbo. He is in here somewhere. Come on. Injured and with two goats. Oh, that's even worse. That's the most encumbered he could possibly be. Okay. Two more dice. Here we go. Come on. Six. Controlled.

Great. A five. Five. Okay. Five. Which means that you are two ticks away from escaping and three ticks away from getting caught. Mm-hmm. And you just fucking rip ass through the fog. Just. I like that. It's like so loud. Yeah. And you turn. Quiet. Cool. As you get into the fog and it quiets down and you're rumbling along for a second, you see the grasses, the candy grasses start to whip by you on either side. You look behind you and you see like low to the ground fucking sprinting. Shathane.

Whoa. Yeah. Oh my God. Like his cloak is over his head and his cape is whipping behind him and he's just booking. Like Naruto? Yeah, totally. Well, I mean, he's moving his arms but not quite like Naruto. I imagine he is. Yeah, backwards hands. He just looks stupid. But it is kind of that sort of leg movement. Like his legs are moving so fast. He's very quick. But he sees that you're pulling away on the cart that you're faster than him and then he darts into the grass. Really? Yeah. Ugh. God.

I would like to use subterfuge tools. Whoa. What's this? I don't know. This is bad. He pulls out like a toolbox. This is like a black case. Like it looks amazing. Like something really impressive. What is that? He took that from Greg. You know, yes. I did. I stole this from Greg. It's a frog man in the Marines. Yeah, it says like GM on it. Like monogrammed. Wow. Those are his best tools. Yeah. Oh, he's going to be pissed. We need to use these. You know what my immediate thought was?

Was some sort of smoke grenade. Yeah, that's what I was thinking too. Except Fenton sets all of them off and then dumps them off the back of the cart so it creates like the whole place is full of smoke. Okay, we're going to call that wreck, I think. Well, I mean, no. You tell me what you're using. I forgot. I can't. I don't get to decide that. I am going to use Tinker, actually. Tinker, okay. So this would be risky. Yeah. Great, I guess. Yeah.

Like, it's like I open it up and there's like so much shit in here. I do not understand how it works. But I just do. I do see like a bank of like 15 grenades, essentially. And I'm just like, okay. And then I put all of my fingers in the pins and pull them all and just kick it off the back. I like that he's like pulls out the pins. He's like, all right, do your worst. And then he thinks it's just throwing the shit out of him. Throwing the pins at him. That's so funny.

And Clover realizes what I just fucking did and she kicks the case. Uh-huh. Amazing. You can go love Vardy and throw a bunch of grenade pins at him. Yeah. Clover starts seeing you throw the pins and then she's like, wait, and kicks the case off the back. And then it's just like hits the ground and goes. It's like when the chicken truck explodes in 21 Jump Street. Like there's a second of absolute silence. Oh, yeah. And then it explodes. And then it explodes. Right. Yeah.

We're just like, oh, we thought something was gonna happen. So risky standard pulling all the pins on all of the devices in Greg's special case. Yeah. Actually, yeah, I activated everything. Even the stuff that wasn't grenades. I don't know what any of this shit does. Clover's in the background like Fenton's not really listening to her, but she's like listing off what everything is and she's like flipping out like pulling on her hair like, oh my God.

What are a couple things that Clover says these are? Oh, one of them is jellyfish. It's like a blow shooter and it ejects like all this weird like gel that is impenetrable. One of these is like a foam. I don't know what that does, but I mean, it spreads like crazy. Yeah. Yeah. There's a thing in here that's just a Claymore. A full on Claymore mine from World War II on Earth. Yeah. There's a few like antique. Antique bombs. I don't know.

I mean, he would have some antique stuff probably from the Wizard War. Yeah. That's just. Just like magic. Anti-magic grenades and shit. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So roll it. Tinker. Risky standard. Five. Five. Okay. So that gives you enough to fill your getaway clock. Yes. You set off all the grenades and Clover turns around freaking out, kicking the case off the cart, seeing what you've done and then boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Smoke fills the area. Fireworks go off. Oh, shit.

Some sort of gooey goo field emits from one of the devices. Buzz saws fly by in front of us. Yeah. Like Wild Wild West. Yeah. Some shit's on fire for some reason and then immediately goes out like it's just burning and then extinguished and you get to you see the chocolate river right in front of you. There it is. What do you do? I think that the momentum from all the blasts kind of gives us some like air. Oh, yeah. And sends you over the water. Basically. Okay.

It's a little ramp that we steer towards. Yeah. It's like there's a little broken part on the end that you're able to the cart like hits and sends you over and just before you get to the edge Adric leaps over the side of the cart and lands and is like go, go and Taylor is gripped onto his back like go and you hit the cart as Shathane comes booking out of the grass right next to you. Holy shit. And the cart hits the ramp and sends it flying. Over the chocolate river slow motion.

Everybody Dukes of Hazzard style going and slams into the opposite wall as Shathane takes into the wall. Sorry. Into the, you know, like it hits the ramp and the wall. So the cart kind of crunches but you're all thankfully I mean, kind of battered but you land on the other side alive at least and Shathane leaps and it looks like he's reaching out just as like almost ready to leap across and then out of the way.

Bushes Borbo dives and spear tackles Shathane shit onto the shore and stand and is just like Shathane comes up on the roll and is holding Borbo down like across the neck with his arm but he looks up at you and he doesn't say anything. He's just watching. What do we do? We can't leave Borbo here. And then Fenton goes I have a plan and he pulls the dark chocolate off of his back and and! And he grabs a little bit of it and he sprinkles it in the water and then a giant shape surfaces and eats it.

Oh. Cause there's like a there's like a there's shit in the water. There's like a giant sea monster. How there's something in the water. And I go let him go or I'll feed this chocolate to this shit monster in this river. So you'll give me the chocolate then? Yeah, but you gotta let Borbo go first. Are you lying? Oh yeah, 100%. Then you gotta roll. Okay. So this is this is risky uh, risky standard. I can aid. No, but you'll you'll fill up your stress track. I mean, we're at the end.

Doesn't matter. You're gonna take drama though. I will. Okay. Worth it. Okay. I'm a changed woman. Yeah, again. We did this on my heavy day on my period. Oh god. Yeah. Alright. So I that take that's four die? Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. Alright. Roll it. Desperate standard. I'm staring him in the eyes. Yes. I'm summoning up every bit of business acumen that my father gave to me. And by business acumen I mean absolute complete lack of morality and duplicity. Yeah. Tomato, tomato. Yep. Here we go.

Give me the sixes. Okay. Three, five, two, and six. Yeah. Alright. He just gets up and he hauls Borbo to his feet and he pushes him towards the like broken like the shore of the chocolate river. Yeah. And I guess what? Borbo starts crawling across? Yeah. How does he get across? He's gotta jump. Well, we're near that broken bridge. Yeah, that's true. And I go over to help him. Yeah, you guys go help him. It's not a big risky thing. He's going across. Mm-hmm. I'll come over to Fenton to help him.

Whatever we're gonna do next probably won't be close to you because I'm like something's gonna happen. And Shathane gestures for you to throw the chocolate over. And Fenton I have lights out, licorice, trans powder. I have so many things. Mm-hmm. Ooh. Fenton throws he throws the entire bag over. Of chocolate? Yeah. No. Okay, alright. So you throw the bag over. Okay. Yeah. And he reaches down.

In a moment of desperation I grab Franklin's backpack which has a bunch of like explosives and shit in it. Mm-hmm. And I I'm gonna throw that instead of my backpack. Okay, so that's a flashback. Uh-huh. So it's gonna cost one of you a stress. I'll take it. Okay. Does that fill your stress track? Yes. Okay. A changed boy. A changed boy. You see what you're doing and we're like no! Don't give him all the chocolate! Borbo's important but the chocolate is more important for everyone. Thanks, guys.

Thanks, guys. And then I Borbo's our friend but chocolate's worth money. You guys are making this lie less convincing every second to passings. But then Fenton turns around and he looks Shatane right in the eyes and he's like you fucking piece of shit I'll give it to you, okay? I'll give you the chocolate. And then I tossed it across. So he reaches down and he picks up the bag and he opens it and poof! This like huge cloud of trance powder hits him in the face.

And he's like and he blinks and coughs and swears. But you see him swaying on his feet. He drops to a knee and Adric starts hustling you away back towards where the tunnels are. And he turns back to Shathane. He says, you're getting soft, brother. What? And that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your Game Master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always, playing Fenton Beasley, the slide of dual disease. So are. Playing Franklin Stein, the cutter, Paul Oppers. What about the goats?

And playing clover ivy fern, Jessica Tai. The goats! Thank you to Samuel Quinn Morris for our incredible intro and outro music. Thank you to Duam Figueroa for writing World of Blades. And thanks to John Harper for writing the game that was based on Blades in the Dark. If you want to susport the show, you're here. So thank you to all of our supporters around the world. We love you ever so much. We'll see you next time. Goodbye.

And so ends the tale Of the cool treat kids Always up to no good So tiny and greedy And angsty they be And the cold the cold They navigate crime and puberty. And though our journey may belie a conclusion, we will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to the chocolate store as the cool treat kids plan their next score. And for you, I'll gladly spout ma.