Episode 5 – Kids who Live in Candy Glass Houses Should Not Throw Blades

Pickaxe You've seen them around, they sell sweets by the pound Their wares are famously tasty So here I sing, singing to you Of crimes involving chemistry Clover's the whisper, she makes all the sweets She has a kind of addiction Benton's the slob, he seeks the sake And he writes vampire fanfiction Franklin's the cutter, his fighters strength Despite his stance, his heart Best and brightest, they may not be But that's my favorite part So gather round, friends And listen close For the tale's about to start Hello everybody and welcome to Spoutmore Mall Brats I'm your game master Sean O'Hara Joining me as always playing Fenton Beasley the slide, Abdul Aziz Hello everybody Playing Franklin Stein the cutter, Paul Oppers Hi there And playing Clover Ivy Fern the whisper, Jessica Tai Hello When last we left our heroes They were engaged in their downtime activities Recovering from the shocking events Of the dance and revelation of Clover's survival At the lighting section of a Home Depot, basically A variety of events took place The hot meat boys and the cool treat kids Agreed to an uneasy alliance In their quest to take down The gentrification operations of the vineyard Oh yeah Yeah Did we come up with a cool combined name?

It's, so you get three guys From, you get three crew members in your cohort Because it's a tier zero cohort It's not a ton And they're the cold cut trio That's pretty good And their names are What? Ham, baloney, and what's the other one?

Salami Falado Falado That's great So you've got, yeah, you've got your cohort The cold cut trio That they'll do whatever you need to do I think they have some like drawbacks or something like that But I'll figure that out Oh, that's fun Like they have things that impede us? Yeah, basically like impede themselves Like some cohorts are They're dumb I mean, basically Let me One kid can't poop Unless he's at home Yeah What are their names?

Mufalado Mufalado Hambone Ham Hambone I like Hambone Hambone Mufalado And Tony Baloney Tony Baloney Tony Baloney These are names that we've given them, by the way Yeah Actually, my name's Craig Yeah You went to the Humberstone Twins to get some information Yeah About what the food court is up to Yes And their answer was a ton of stuff But they're also working against each other So no one really knows exactly what's going on Yeah Just that there's a lot of tension and infighting And I think there's like also a rat, apparently, in the food court Right That is reporting to Tina Durger Who's trying to position herself to take over the food court Yes A mall rat Oh no Not again We gotta find this thing out Yeah, so someone in the food court is working with Tina Durger Probably in an attempt to maintain their own position once Tina moves on the food court Yeah Tina is also working with the Vickery Yes I believe that the Vickery is the one that uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu I believe that the Vickery uses the đâu Dark chocolate.

Yeah. Dirty how I want, you're asking. Extra bitter cocoa powder. So we just make dark chocolate? We just make a better version of that chocolate. But the whole time the cool treat kids are in their candy lab going like. Yeah, we're like, who would eat this? Who would eat this garbage? Kids and dark chocolate. There's barely any sugar in it. It's so gross. We accidentally make the world's best wine as well. This grape juice has gone bad. Years ago.

Franklin began his work of uniting various kid gangs to the cause of the cool treat kids. Kind of under the general message of the cool treat kids being, if they're coming for us, it's only a matter of time before they come for you. Totally. And the last thing that we did was Clover went to Millie. Her mall security friend slash former contact. Scrunchie sister. Scrunchie sisters. A bond unbreakable. Yeah. Who told her that Tina has recently purchased a club underneath the Nogwizers.

A speakeasy of sorts. Film noir themed speakeasy. Yeah. Film noir themed restaurant that she calls a speakeasy. Oh, it's called the Nog Hole. Yeah. The Nog Hole beneath Nogwizers. And Millie suggested that if you wanted to know more about Tina's operations, that if you were to break into the speakeasy, there might be some ledgers or information that you could gather to help you in your fight against Tina. And did you dye your hair with a streak of black? I did, yes. You cut a chunk out too?

I cut a chunk out. I think because I got some bubble gum in there or something like that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Right. So you kind of have like a really intense, like, goth kid vibe right now. Like side cut, kind of undercut thing? No, not undercut. It's like a chunky kind of bang that I've dyed black. And then my natural, regular purple hair. That's so funny. A straightened, chopped black part to a wavy lavender. Yeah, because it was curling awkwardly.

So like, I was like, I guess I just have to strain it. It's really emo. Yeah, it's super emo. And then we got into Master Guild, Gilbert. Yes, that is the, that is the image that we left ourselves on was Master Gilbert, the three person trench coat disguise. We're more powerful than we've ever been, my friends. We're like a centipede, but human. So the first thing that we need to figure out is what kind of plan, what kind of score this is going to be.

Choices as always are assault, deception, stealth, occult, social, and transport. Social is one of them I'm looking at. Yeah. Because we're going in here to the, to find information, but we could also somehow try to convince them that we're a major investor in town looking to get into real estate. So that's, so that's more in the deception. Yeah. Yeah. If you guys are going in, in disguise to like trick people, then that will be a deception kind of plan. That makes sense to me.

How many are you allowed to choose? It's just like, you only choose one cause it's basically like you need what the detail is, the method of deception. But we figured out what that is already. It's a Master Gilbert. Yeah. So I guess, so we're going for deception. Then I love that. Cause for a while, it wasn't you like with Mr. Gilbert, you're like, just so you know, you can do this all you want, but this never works. Basically. Now we're like, just shoehorn it in as a possibility.

It's weird because like, it always kind of works a little bit. Like someone's always like, all right, sure. You're an adult. Yeah. I think it's, I think it's Fenton's like mesmerism. Right. Just like, sure. He's a real guy. And that we're in a fantasy world. Yeah, totally. So it's like, there are weird people around. Yeah. He's mid metamorphosis. Yeah. Just a weirdo. Yeah. Some kind of weird. I don't know. You know, I've asked what's under trench coats before. I didn't like the answer I got.

So I'm not going to ask that again. Just some kind of weird freak. Yeah. All right. Then we're thinking, then we're doing the engagement role. Okay. Okay. So we start with one die for sheer luck. And D six. Yeah. Is this operation? Wait, hold on. I know. Just getting our role practice. Yeah. Is this operation particularly bold or daring or overly complex or contingent on many factors? Yeah. Yeah. Overly complex. I think you just said yes to all of those. It's literally everything. Okay.

It's three kids who are uneducated and objectively like sort of like emotionally unstable, kind of trying to foil a real estate developer. Uh huh. Historically the most powerful of all entities. Yeah. Totally. Not knowing what even a condominium is. Yeah. Yeah. Good point. Okay. So we're going to take one away. Which leaves you at zero. Currently. Currently. Okay. Okay.

Uh, does the plans detail expose a vulnerability of the target or hit them where they're weakest or are they strongest against this approach or have a particular defense or special preparation? They're, they're weak against vanity. So if we come in like really praising and talking money, like we could triple your investment. Yeah. And also we know that, uh, the whole thing kind of hinges on Tina having enough capital from the dark chocolate to do this deal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like over leverage herself by making deals with a lot of different people. She got in the future game that her butt can't cash me. Yeah. So, uh, yeah. So you get another, you get one dive for that. So you're back at one. Can any of your friends or contacts provide aid or insight or are your enemies or rivals interfering in the operation? I have friends helping. Oh yeah. Yeah. I've got Millie. Millie. Yep.

Doris is always a good, the hot meat boys, the Hubberstone twins, the Hubberstone twins or not. I cannot stress enough. They are, they, They might be neutral, but they helped. So they'll help us and her. Yeah, exactly. They'll help whoever's coming to pay them. Yeah. Like, is anybody coming with you? I, we just are going on our own. Yeah. Yeah. So your friends are not helping you, in fact. Yeah. Although I guess Millie helped you like get in and stuff like that. Yeah, she knows where I was.

Okay, fine. Take a plus one. Yes. Because you know how to get in, which is, that's half the thing in a speakeasy, right? Is knowing where to go. Yeah. Yeah. That's funny. Part of it. Yeah. At like a speakeasy themed restaurant, there's like, speakeasy this way. It was like, lit up sides everywhere. Are there any other elements you want to consider? Maybe a lower tier target will give you a plus one. They're definitely a higher tier. Oh, yeah. So you're going to lose another one.

So you're at what, one right now? Mm-hmm. Okay. Is there anything else we can take into account? Do you want to bring the cold cut trio with you? No, I don't trust them at all. This is too big a job. Yeah. Only pros can do it. Okay. Unfortunately, they heard us say all that. Yeah. So they're like, all right, we see how it is, boss. If this is going to be, I don't even, I don't even care what you think about me. He's got a rolled up piece of bologna in his mouth, like a cigar. Ew.

There's cheese inside of it. Yeah. He's just kind of slowly eating it. Yeah. All right. And then you tell us, you call us when you need us. All right. Thank you. Okay. So we're sitting currently at one die. Is there any other ways that you can think that you could gather some more dice for this? I don't think so. Um. Yeah. Cause you're going in alone. You've said that for sure. Yeah. Bologna's not coming. The cold cut trio's not coming. Yeah. Then you got one dice. One die.

Let's, let's roll that die. So choose that die wisely. Is it just one between all of us? Yeah. It's just one person rolls one die. Trust. Trust me. We trust you. We trust you with your unicorn die. In your eighties onesie. Fuck. It's a two. A two. Wow. My eighties onesie failed us. You didn't do enough cocaine before you rolled. Nobody saw that coming. That was a one. Oh my. Could have been worse. He's done too much cocaine now. Okay. So a two is a bad result.

You're in a desperate position when the action starts. This makes sense. We're in Master Gilbert form. And you're a hundred percent committed to going in as Master Gilbert. Oh yeah. Okay. And all of us are smoking. Okay. There's a lot of smoke coming out of this thing. I'm in the middle. Yeah. So it's just coming out the gut. Yeah. You guys all have those, uh, those stage cigarettes where you blow into them and baby powder comes out. Yeah. Totally. Uh, it's, it's, uh, evening.

You're going into nighttime. The noir aesthetic has maintained. Yeah. It's dark in this part of the mall right now. The lights are off. There's lampposts burning. There's like a fog rolling on the ground. Cause, uh, somebody's, uh, The air conditioning's fucked up. The air conditioning's fucked on this part of the mall right now. And the sign for Nogweiser's neon sign flashing, flickering a little bit. There's a couple sad, lonely souls at the bar.

And there's a guy in a button down shirt with the garters on the sleeves. So what can I do for you, Mr. Gilbert? Gilbert. My stomach says. I'm fucking starving. And then, uh, yeah. Uh, Benton like puts his hand where Clover's face is in the middle of the, it was like, sorry. Yeah. Uh, I had some bad spaghetti earlier and it is repeating on me. Oh, are you, uh, you said a spaghetti there. Is that a regional accent or did you just misspeak? Uh, no, it's a regional accent. I'm from.

Don't just say Italy. Come up with something else. I'm from Burt grass. Oh, I've never been. Yeah. It's a, it's coastal city. It's really nice. You know, sometimes I think about getting out of this place and going to the coast, but too many strings tying me down to this mall. It's hard to get out of the mall. It's hard. Everything. Every time you think you're dragging yourself out of here, that high spear just stabs right through you. I hear that. So anyways, what can I get for you?

Master Gilbert? Um, give me something that'll make me forget my troubles. Ah, give me something for a new beginning friend. Ah, I've got Franklin yells and a stool. We've been standing there for a little while. He's been doing squats for weeks. But it's a lot. Uh, and he goes, he grabs a bottle off the top shelf top shelf. Yeah. Pours a dark brown liquid of some kind into a shot glass and slides down the bar to you. He doesn't catch it. He's like, Oh my gosh.

Cause it, Benton's arms are too short. So he's got two mannequin arms. He's got a plastic. He's holding two plastic mannequins. Shatters against his mannequin arms. Yeah. And then he goes, another, my friend. He pours another one and he puts it in front of you. Thank you. Hey, this on the house for a fellow lost soul. And I say, if you ever get out to vert grass way, try and get yourself on a catamaran. Oh yeah. A lot of men take to the ocean to try and find themselves. Oh yeah.

And then he dips the mannequin hand in the glass and then licks it. It's extremely strong liquor. And then he's like, yummy. I love it. So much. Man of taste I see. Yeah. So much taste. You know what? I'll drink with you. He's crying. Yeah. I'll drink with you. And he pours a shot glass for himself. And this is your desperate action. Oh no. Fenton's gotta get drunk.

You're gonna have to roll some sort of physical thing to either trick him into thinking that you drank it, but not drinking it or drinking it and taking the hit. I want to kind of like trick him into turning around and say, oh, look, it's Tina Derger's over there. She looks like she's mad at you for drinking on the job. All right. So that's going to be a consort. Yeah. And it's going to be a desperate. Yeah. Okay. A five and a four. Five and a four.

So he turns around as he's taking his drink and like turns to go look at the door. And when he turns, what do you do? I just knock the glass over and then I slam the sleeve of the trench coat down on it to dry up the thing. Great. Damn. Wow. And that is the consequence that you're going to be dealing with is you now reek of liquor already. Franklin and Clover, you are smelling very, very strong whiskey inside. What is, is he drinking? Is that alcohol? I think it might be alcohol.

Smells like a fire. And he turns back and goes, oh, no, I don't think so. Oh, I don't think so. No, I don't think that was her. Say, how do you know the name Tina Durger? And Fenton leans in and he's like, Tina Durger is actually my business in town. That's why I came to this mall. I heard she's lining up a business deal. And I think I have a proposal that might be of interest to her. Interesting. I ran a mining operation at Vertgrass Way. We mined some pretty valuable materials.

I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know what you're talking about. I just wanted to get some real material out of a pretty dense jungle. And I heard she might need similar skills for a project she was working on. He puts up his hands and goes, well, I don't know nothing about that, Chief. I just work the bar. But you know, if you know where to look. And then Fenton's like, well, she's trying to get dark chocolate out of the…

I said, if you know where to look, maybe she's a bit closer than you think. Yeah, but you seem unaware of the situation. Maybe she's just wearing something. And she's a bit closer. And I'm like elbowing Fenton like I start turning. Franklin starts walking. Fenton's turning his head to keep talking as his body's leaving. Wait, I have to tell this guy what the situation is! And you turn around and start walking towards where you've been told the speakeasy is.

And like we were discussing, it is a speakeasy themed club. So there is a sign that says speakeasy with an arrow pointing down the hallway. And you find the blank wall with the painting on it. And it's a painting of… A bouncer. A bouncer. So it's a big burly dude with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. But he's wearing a fedora to keep it very on theme. Yeah, exactly.

And Franklin walks up and he knocks three times, waits, and then knocks three times, and then knocks once, and then holds on for a second, and then traces his finger around it, and then barks like a dog and goes, hey! And the bouncer poster slides to the side, revealing an identical bouncer behind him. Oh, okay. There's a… You did the knock, but there's also a password. The password is I got money for Tina Derger. Please. He steps to the side and points you down the stairs.

His eyes widen a little. Yeah. And then we walk through, but because of the three kids' stack, I hit my head on the door. You have to reach your mannequin arms up to keep your fedora in place. I tell you, sir, it's a curse being this tall sometimes. Tell me about it. Look at how wide I am. That's a curse for me, too. And you walk down the tight staircase of the nog hole. Like this. He's limboing backwards. Yeah. Clover's abs are just tight. I have… Every…

The app is working full time right now. Over time, around the clock. You've never wished more that you were a teenager, so you would have developed a little bit more muscle. Weeks away from my teen birthday. If only we'd had more time. And as you're walking down, you hear saxophone and trumpets and like a… Is it jazz? Oh, yeah, it's jazz. It's jazz. And you hear… Like a… It never seen a man like you.

And I'm singing on the stage in a mic and my dress is real tight and it's also a color that reminds you of being in love. And you come down and there is a… Young and tall and… The girl from Panuja. And then she walks. And she walks. That's pretty good. That's excellent. That's so good. And who's the singer? What are we looking at when we come down? There's a band and a singer. Allison. I was gonna… Abdul got so excited he punched his mic stand over. That sounded so cool. I'm sorry.

That's a bonus. I was way too excited about that. Literally just… It would be so cool if it was Allison, though. Okay, it's Allison. We know she's in the mall. You saw her at the Nogwiser's before. Yeah, a few weeks ago. So you see a woman on stage. She seems to be in her early 20s. Olive skin, long dark hair, like in that real film noir singer one big wave that comes down her shoulder and curls in front of her chest. Slinky red dress, long gloves.

She's dressed exactly like Jessica Rabbit from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Whoa. Oh my god. Abdul. Uh, there's like a tall half-elf playing a stand-up bass. Oh, cool. There's, um… Like on a bowstring. Yeah, he's got a bow. That's so cool. He looks like maybe he was a retired ranger. That… Wait. Not shipping. Okay. Just another guy, maybe. It seems like this is a time when a lot of rangers maybe quit. Yeah, in the wind after the exodus. We got a dwarf playing a trumpet. Mm-hmm.

And we got an elf in… Or a hobnoblin in the middle of the night. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. A little… A little shirt and a little hat playing just a snare drum. Oh, cool. Yeah. And you think, is that the fucking… Hobnoblin from our house? Is that the hobnoblin from our house? And you come down the stairs and he sees you and he winks and he tips his hat. He keeps playing the drums. It's like Duke Ellington from, uh… Oh, Duke Silver?

Duke Silver from, uh, Parks and Rec. Parks and Rec. When Ron secretly is a saxophone prodigy. He, like, he pulls his fedora down and then turns away from us. Yeah. And yeah, so Allison, she does… She's like, you know, it's a very, uh…

She, like, winks at a guy in the front and he, like, puts his hand on his chest and she reaches down and, like, puts her hand, like, under this young lady's chin and, like, caresses under her chin and she, like, almost falls out of her chair as she's following the caress. Uh, we know she's a succubus, so we would know she is playing this room like a fucking fiddle. Mm-hmm. Wow. And actually, this would probably be a really great way for a succubus to feed. Yeah, totally.

Because she's just, like, on an audience. All desire, is being, like, directed at her. That's interesting. I imagine it's like a buffet, though. Yeah. Where it's like, sometimes you don't want a buffet. Yeah, totally. I mean, other people. I always just want to go to a buffet. Um, but yeah, you're in the club. There's music. There are, uh, waiters and waitresses, uh, going table to table, serving out food and drink. A whole crazy, like, densely packed crowd in here.

There's a guy at the door that hands you a fedora if you don't have one. Yeah. They stop people, like, hey, man, there's a dress code. They put a fedora on you in a blazer. So what are you doing? Hey, Fenton, he looks down into his, no one's looking at us from now, right? It's a pretty busy place. Okay. He looks down into his trench coat and he's like, what the fuck do we do now? We look for somebody we recognize. We're here to commiserate and find out the ledger.

Maybe, it's probably by the back, right? That's where they keep all the information. Oh, are we here to steal a ledger? Yeah, we're here to get their numbers. Okay. I thought we were here to just talk to Tina Durger. It's good that you guys reminded me of that. Fenton's a little drunk. I am a little bit drunk with my friends from licking some alcohol off a mannequin's hand. Hey man, if you know a better way to get drunk, I would love to hear it.

Yeah, so when you say somebody that you're familiar with, somebody that you recognize, what do you mean? Clover's peeking out of like the belly button sort of zone with the coat. Yeah, you're gonna have to roll for that. Tell me what you would use. I have two in sight. Mm-hmm. So like, I would survey the area. Yeah. Yep. And you use your insight to just be like, all right, who feels like they're… Yeah. I got a six and a one. Okay, so you spot…

Maybe somebody with a clear green visor with one of these things. Just sitting outside in the actual club. Yeah. Yeah, you see an actual accountant with the bright green clear visor and some sort of current camera calculator sitting at a table kind of back in the corner next to the bar in a booth that looks like employees sit there a lot and they're just tapping away. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. Ka-ching. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. Ka-ching. Stacks of Spearbox everywhere.

No, no, no, no money out here. Oh. Yeah, you'd be out of your mind. It's the sound of money. Let's go that way. Yeah. Okay, two walk over. All right, yeah, you wander over. It's a short, portly, uh, man in his 50s with little pince-nez glasses. And as we're walking over, I'm like, okay, so you guys want me to talk to this guy to, like, get him a drink and then get him drunk and then, what, we steal, like, his ledger or whatever? I don't know. Let's just get over there and see what we can see.

Okay. He's like, you can hear him muttering to himself. He's like, hi, yeah, hi. Oh, he's just carrying the one math sounds. Oh, cheers. One, two, three, four, plus, minus, equal sign. None of this is adding up. None of this is adding up at all. Should I talk to him? Here we go. Well, okay, one, what are you rolling? Two, what are you doing? I'm gonna invite him to have a drink with me. Uh-huh.

Yeah, because I can see, I, like, I touch him on the shoulder with one of the mannequin hands and I'm like, excuse me, sir. Yes, what, what, what? And I say, I've traveled a really long way tonight and my head is filled with memories of my father. Okay. Okay. And I was like, my father, he was an account manager, much like you. It would mean a lot to me if you sit down and have a drink with me and tell me your story. All right. Risky? Great. Okay. So, yeah, what are you rolling?

Uh, I guess, I think I'm lying, so it's a good swing. It's sway, yeah. Okay, so two dice. Two threes, shit. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh, you could push yourself. You could take a devil's bargain. Yeah, we'll take a devil's bargain. Oh, wow. Okay, so that means you roll again, but something bad will happen regardless. Roll both dice again? Nope, just one. Just one. Okay. And the bad thing that happens is Tina Duggar comes in and notices me. Does she, like, recognize us?

Well, I mean, it's a little boy's head sticking out of a trench coat. No, Mr. Gilbert is pretty convincing. Okay. We've always said, but she notices that a guy is talking to her, like, her accounting guy. Fenton has a really convincing, a real beard that he bought off a dwarf. Yeah. And we brought a fedora on, too. I know, yeah. It does not look like me at all. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Five. Five. Okay. So, with consequence.

So, yeah, you sit down and he goes, um, yes, all right, please, take a seat. I could use a break. And he takes his pince-nez glasses off, rubs the bridge of his nose, slides his big calculator aside. What are you drinking? Um, I have some tapioca balls in a cup. Ah. My favorite. Uh. Ah. Uh, vertgrassian, I see. Yeah. Louise, too, this way, please.

And a few moments later an orc bartender comes over and puts two cups full of tapioca balls on the table and he takes a sip and goes like, mmm, delicious. Yes. So, tell me about your father. I start telling him a long tale and I think in Fenton's mind he's like, if I engross this guy then Franklin and Clover can sneak out from the trench coat and… So you'll just be standing on the stool? Yeah. Okay. Okay, so you're sitting in a booth. That's one thing. Yeah.

So you slide into the booth with this guy. Aren't those your pants? Running away. So, yeah, the bottom half is like totally concealed so I can just stand in the booth while they kind of like get out of there. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. And I tell him, I start a long story. Okay. And I go, my father was a, he was an oil man. And cut to… Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

So, yeah, you see, okay, so Franklin and Clover, you're trying to sneak out. Yeah. Yeah, there's a door at the back that's two more pictures, paintings of bouncers that now we know that I have bouncers behind them. I want to know who's coming and going, what's going on. I want to go try and get a peek back in that room. Okay, so what are you rolling to do this? Finesse to try and sneak around the crowd. Yeah. Okay. Is that more of a prowl? Prowl is definitely, that's the sneaking. Okay.

So, yeah, this is going to be risky for sure, but if you can get back there, then you'll be able to move around a little more. And I'm still dressed like pants, so I'm sneaking around under tables and just like blending with other pants. Okay. Ha ha ha. You're a genius. Ha ha ha. Blending in with other pants. Yeah, so out of the corner of somebody's eye, they're like, what the? Oh, that's just some guy's legs. And then all of a sudden, he has like a beetle's legs. Okay, cool.

So, yeah, roll them. Hmm, a three and a one. Three and a one. That is a failure. Yeah. Unless you want to push yourself or… Yeah, I want to push myself. Okay. I'll take some stress. You can't aid someone, right? Yeah. You can aid. Oh, I could aid him? We do aid. Oh, yeah. Can I help him? Yeah, yeah, yeah, hold on. Do you go with him? Yeah, I think I'm good. I get, we're maybe, that's, I was thinking that maybe we could be in either leg of the pants. Yeah, that's a good idea. Yeah, yeah.

I also thought I could like get on your shoulders. Oh, yeah. Actually, I'm already on your shoulders. Yeah, you are. Now you're just a girl with huge legs. You're just a girl. I can pretend to be a waiter. That's fine. Oh, yeah, and you are disguised because you've dyed your hair kind of black. Yeah. Yeah, so you grab a tray full of drinks. Frankly, would it make sense if I pretend to be a waiter? Yeah. You know, blend in with these other sexy ladies? Yeah, just one of the sexy waiters.

Yeah, with long pants. Yeah, totally. Cool. So, yeah, you may assist the team. You may assist the team by taking one stress to give the player one die. I'll do that. Yeah. Okay. So, I grab an empty plate off like a table. Just a plate. Yeah, just a plate. It's got, it's still got some remains of like shrimp scampi on it. So I'm carrying it like a waiter. Yeah. This guy turns around and dips his shrimp on the table like, what the fuck? Where'd my shrimp cells go?

All right, so you take one stress and you get another die. So, I get one more die? Yeah. Sweet. Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. Stop being sick. Three. Fuck. Fuck. Can I take another stress? I mean, I can't see why not because the only downside is that you're going to have more stress, right? You're closer to taking more drama. Yeah, you pick up another plate. I pick up another plate. Okay. Just keep stacking them on. Yeah. Yeah. So, I'm bouncing two.

Anybody listening, maybe this is against the rules, but I think the cost is worth the one. What the fuck is happening? You dropped the plates. I did. My pants, my pants fall down. Revealing a young man. I dropped the plates because the pants are falling down, so I have to pull them back up. Yeah. So, you can still resist the consequence if you choose. Since this was risky, it would cost you two stress to resist the consequence of this roll. Me? Yeah, I'll do it. Okay.

So, your cover won't be blown. You can still pretend to be a waiter. Yeah. I can still pretend to be pants. Yeah, I imagine it's like you feel the pants start to fall, so you start to let go of the plates just as Franklin like, goes like this. So, all of a sudden, you have really wide hips. He puts his elbows out. Whoa, silly me. And then he kind of does like a rumba dance thing like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And then Clover's doing a little like hip movement like, dancing to the music.

Yeah. You can see that Allison's getting kind of pissed because you're drawing attention to her. She feels it. She feels the attention weighing in one side of the club and looks over to see what's going on. Is that a succubus? I don't know what it is now. Clover's looking like, no, that's just a, that's just a weird kid because she can tell she's not getting any energy off you guys. So she's like, there's two kids in those pants. That's not my business. I'm gonna let it fly.

Yeah, so you are not going to be able to get to that doorway the way that you were hoping for, but you are still survive the moment. Yeah, exactly. You're still undercover as pants. Okay, give me that. Okay, cut back to the booth. Mr. Gilbert is having a conversation with this, this accountant whose name you've learned is Maurice. Okay, and that was, that was when we all realized, Maurice, that there would be blood. I'm finished.

He drains the last of his tapioca balls, puts the glass on the table upside down. And then Fenton goes, I drink your milkshake. I finished. I finished. I finished. I could get, I could get a milkshake. Yes, please. Please order a milkshake, sir. Louise or whatever your name was. Two more. Two milkshakes, please. So you look back and you now see Clover holding two empty plates covered in the remnants of food. I'm going to look for a milkshake on the table somewhere.

And it's as you turn around that you see at the bar smoking a cigarette out of a long ivory cigarette holder in like a blazer with the skirt, you know, like the, the skirt suit. Yeah. Oh, pants. Tina Durger. She's at the bar watching the show. She claps idly as Allison finishes her song. She hasn't noticed me yet. She sees somebody talking to Maurice very clearly. She looks over and sees that Fenton is sitting in the booth. She starts to get up. Franklin's. Let's go. Yeah. Okay.

I'm peeking at the zipper. I know what's going on. Yeah. Like this. Two fingers poking out of the zipper. What's going on out there? I rush over to Maurice first. Hello. Good evening, sir. And, and, and sir, what may I get you to drink tonight? And then Fenton, he puts one of the, the mannequin arms in front of Maurice and he's like, let me get this one. Don't drink. And he's like, can we have, please have two milkshakes? Absolutely. I think we should try and get his wallet. Whose wallet?

The numbersman. Right. Okay. Can, can I drop one of my trays and, and in trying to pick it up, like try to steal Maurice's wallet? I'll try and steal his wallet through the zipper fly. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So that sounds like Clover is setting up Franklin. A group action. Yeah. I mean, unless you're both using sway, because remember with the group action, you have to use the same, um, action.

Well, I can, I can join in on this group action and distract Maurice and then it is a sway thing because we're distracting him and trying to steal from him. I, and I, the thing is, is I think this is a very, uh, complex action that you're attempting. So it's going to be a group action. It's going to be desperate. Yeah. Which means if you fail, it's going to be bad. Cause Tina, it has noticed us. Yeah. And then there's pressure.

All she has to do is see Fenton in the booth to realize that he's a little kid standing on, on the bench in a long coat. Okay. We need to get this wallet and pretend to be pants again. Okay. So who's leading the group action? You're first. Sure. I think. Okay. Yeah. I'll roll first. Well, who has them? Cause remember, whoever's leading, that means they're taking the stress if other people fail. Okay. I'll take the stress. Okay. I roll. So you guys are using sway. Yeah. What the fuck?

I only got one. Five. Five. Okay. So success with cost. Okay. So I, I dropped the tray and it shatters. Oh God. Oh yeah. Yeah, man. So it's enough that the music stops so loud, such a huge crash, but everybody looks over. Oh, some annoying guy in the back goes, Oh, so many people around and go, that's hilarious. Sorry. Franklin, bend over. Over. God, pick it up. And you are underneath. Maurice tries to move out of the way to give you space, but his pocket is right there. I grab it.

I go into his thing with my finesse. And how is Fenton distracting him in this moment? And he's like, let me tell you about a Tale of Two Cities. It was the best of times and the worst of times. Excellent. Cut away from… You've got old sheer. Okay, I'm going to start a clock. Uh-oh. What's up, everybody? It's your boy Borbo Borbom Borblo, and I'm trying to go on tour with my band B4, the Burly Beach Bod Bros, and we've got some sponsors that we need to play to raise tour funds. Check them out.

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Your alarm is sounding. Well, I think all of that stuff sounds pretty sick, and I would buy it all now. Does that it? Have I fulfilled my contractual obligations? Yeah, you can leave. Okay, great. Bye. Okay, bye. We're going on tour! Okay, so I have started a six segment clock called Tina Catches Wise. Okay. And I filled two segments. Okay. So Tina comes over. I jump back under the table into pants mode. Yeah, same. Yeah, smart. Hot, oh. Oh, yeah. So, Maurice, how's it going? Who's your friend?

And Penton's like, oh. His eyes go so wide. And Penton's like, oh, hello, the illustrious and famous Tina Derger. Oh, you're too kind. It's a pleasure to meet you, ma'am. Oh, please, the pleasure is all yours, certainly. And I reach out a mannequin hand to shake her hand. She shakes it. She, for some reason, doesn't think about the fact that she's shaking a mannequin hand. And he goes, oh. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't.

You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't. You wouldn't.

One of those things where you throw a quarter from across the room in a jukebox. Yeah, totally. Put like a spear buck. At a hobgoblin. Yeah. Into his glass bowl full of spear bucks. I throw a Malteser at him. And the band starts up just playing a regular jaunty old jazz tune. And Fenton goes, give me the space of one song that I might intrigue you with a proposal. A business proposal. All right. You have one song. Freebird. Freebird is like 15 minutes long. Yeah.

So what are you rolling for this? I guess Sway. Because you're lying about the whole thing. Yeah. So this is risky for sure because you're lying directly to the person that you're trying to trick. Yeah. But if I succeed at this, I can distract her and Maurice long enough that these guys can do anything. Yeah, totally. Okay. All right. Here we go. Fuck two threes. Someone can aid you. Oh, Clover pulls out some spear bucks and like shoves them down Fenton's sleeve. And so money just falls out.

Yeah. And yeah, I drop it down there and I go, this is for all the drinks that we're going to be drinking over the course of this evening, I guess. All right. Point of stress taken by Clover for this aid. Okay. This is his action. I take an extra day. One more. Okay. Here we go. Six. Yeah. Six. Excellent. Gold always wins. All right. Very well. Tell me about this business proposition. All right. I am. I'm from Vertgrass, Mrs. Derger. And I ran a pretty successful mining operation out there.

We went into some of the wildest jungles in the country and brought out some of the most valuable materials. We went to the most expensive of the most expensive of the most expensive. The thing I hate about little elves is they never know when to shut their mouths. Where'd you hear about this? Some of your associates.

I would give you the đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu đâu Interesting.

She blows smoke into my face. He coughs from three different parts of his body. She ponders, places her cigarette holder on a little thing so it doesn't touch the tabletop. Says, all right, tell me about the service that you offer. And we're going to cut to Clover and Franklin who are under the table. Tina and Maurice are sufficiently distracted. Are you planning on slipping back out? Which one of us has longer arms, Franklin? Mine are tucked into the pants.

I would like to try to reach up with just my little fingies and pull one of the ledgers out from under like Maurice's stack of papers. Oh, smart. Okay, so what are you using to do this? I will use a prowess. A prowess. Yeah, prowess contains finesse, right? Yeah. Yeah, so that would make sense. Yeah. Single die. Oh, I love that. I'm going to do pretty well. I know I will. What the fuck? I got one. No! Okay, I want her to re-roll that because those dice fucking suck.

Yeah, those are those gross virgin dice. Okay, you guys use them every time and then shit on them when they don't work. I want an eight and I'll take a thing. Yeah, so you can take a point of stress to give Clover one more die. Okay, I'll use this one. Six! Wow. Actually, give me that. No, give me that die. I want to see something. I want to see something. If it's a six again? No, you can't throw three sixes into the wind. Six. Yeah, you barely rolled it. Five. You barely rolled it. Okay, three.

One. All right. I just wanted to make sure. Those are the fantasy by numbers ones, so I'd be like, it would make sense that they would send us weighted dice. Yeah. Yes. Okay, so Franklin takes a point of stress to assist and you get a six. How does Franklin assist? He longer arms leaning in. Somebody cross the… The bar who's like really drunk and seeing double. And then all of a sudden he sees a leg go up and go into a guy's pocket. He can pull out a notebook and then go back into a shoe.

Uh, yeah. So you're grabbing one of the ledgers like off the table above. Yes. Okay. So you slide them like this, like out of the middle, like quickly. Yeah. So you've got a ledger of some kind. Cool. Franklin read it. Okay. Let me start going through it. All right. Um, I'm studying. Okay. Yeah. So this is a control. You're under the table. Great. Um, and you know, I'd say it's standard effect cause you don't actually know what's in this. Yeah. Ledger. I don't have any insight.

So I just one die. Okay. So if you don't have anything, you roll two and take the lowest. The lowest. Okay. But also if like Clover wants to assist or if you want to take a devil's bargain, then you can get a plus one, which means you just take it flat. I do have two insight. I could assist. Actually, if Clover, if, if Clover has two insight, then she would be better suited to do it. I'm doing the role. That's funny.

Cause I just thought that same, cause I had two in prowess for getting the ledger. We just did the roles reversal. Wait a second. Maybe I'll read it. You know, just cause I like read a lot and pretty smart. I read. I know. Comic books. Okay. So two for insight. Two and a six. Okay. Um, so I'm going to start another clock. That is, uh, you've got what you need. Okay. Okay. And since that was a standard role that you succeeded at, you get two ticks on it.

So yeah, you go through this ledger and you find, uh, unfortunately that it is mostly actual like supply ledgers. It's like, Oh, we're getting this booze from this place. These napkins, like it's actual inventory, but you do see, uh, which is what the two ticks are. You do see some entries that don't have fold names. They have like codes basically like numbers and letters.

And those are the only entries, but there's something coming in that hasn't been going out and they've been paying a good amount of money for them. Oh yeah. Cool. So it's not everything you need, but it's a, it's a good start. What does the code say? Sean? Um, CCNJ tap one. So they've been buying something called CCNJ tap one. Regularly every five months, every three months. Nope. Only within the last, uh, I'd say month. And a half. Hmm. Uh, okay.

So Fenton, you're describing the services that Mr. Gilbert can offer. And he goes, I've come across a text that is, uh, it's a remnant from the golden age, a text that describes some of what was in the chocolate factory and, uh, describes some of the creatures that exist in their proprietary information about some of the, uh, dangers that one might encounter while mining whatever it is that one might, it's dark chocolate. You're trying to get dark chocolate. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

I didn't want to keep beating around the bush. I voice down at the very least. You know, I'd love to just believe you, but I also, uh, can't. So maybe you show me a little bit of this information that you so desperately want to sell me. I'm not selling you information. I'm selling you a service. A service. Mrs. Durger. Mr. Durger. Mr. Durger. Just covered the bases. Professor Durger. Dr. Durger. There are creatures in that factory. There are giant flying creatures in the candy clouds.

There are creatures in the candy grass. Some say they are the remnants of the elves that used to serve the wizard who created this factory and this mall. Mutated. Mutated. By living in that factory for so long. Tortured by time. Tortured by time. With claws that would rend a man in half. You're going to have to roll something now. Okay. What are you rolling? Sway? Uh, yeah. Sorry. Sway. Yeah. So it's 2d6. Okay. So yeah, this is risky. Yeah. And I'd say, uh, we'll say standard. Okay. Yeah.

I'm like trying to sell the lie with some truth. Cause she probably knows some of this stuff already if she's trying to get in there. Yeah. Yeah. What the actual fuck is going on? I got a one and a three. This is trash. You're not meant to play this game. Uh, and you want to do anything? Yeah. Can I take a stress and take an extra one? Uh, somebody else can take a stress for you. I'll take a stress. How are you aiding him? Yeah.

Well, you're, you're trying to convince her that you're a good explorer basically. There's dangers in there. Yeah. That I know what the dangers are and that I can, I am the only person who can get in there and get the chocolate and get out. Franklin pulls like his, uh, pan leg up and then puts his leg up on the table and be like, sure. Your scars. And he has all these dancing scars and like scars from all of his adventures on his legs. Cause he used to ride mountain. Yeah. Mountain bikes.

The shins are all parked up. So there's just a straight up foot on the table. A little, a little like young guy's leg on it. Yeah. Yeah. Fenton. He pulls up the pant. Like any points at the mountain biking scars, uh, from the pedals. And he's like, I encountered one of these creatures in the jungles of Penusia driven mad by chocolate and candy. And this is the bite that they left behind. I engaged the creature in single combat. Everyone ran away but me and I survived. And that's why I have this.

And then I leaned down and I opened my palm and Clover puts a piece of dark chocolate in it. And then I drop it on the table for her. Okay. Roll it. Cool. Fucking two. How is this possible? Okay. Can I take a stress for that? Uh, yeah, sure. Yeah. Action. Yeah. Oh, for the chocolate. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Here we go. Oh yeah. Yeah. One more. One more. Okay. You guys are. That one? Not that dice. Okay. Use the blue one. Yeah. There's the sixth one. You guys are really going all in on this. Three.

Holy shit. All right. So since that was risky, I'm going to go ahead and fill in two more segments. Fuck. Fuck. On Tina Catches Wise. This is a smoke filled bar. We are children. We are choking. Yeah. Yeah. There's honestly, we've talked about this before. Nothing wrong with running. Yeah. Like if a job is going bad, there's nothing wrong with running away. Okay. I'm two away from trauma. Drama. Yeah. Whoa. Holy shit. Holy shit. So Tina picks up the chocolate that you've left.

Laid on the table at the little nugget and she sniffs it and she licks it. Goes. Hmm. So you say that the creatures in the mall have been mutated, but then you also say that the creatures in Panusia have been mutated just by regular old chocolate, like cocoa beans. Um, uh, yeah. The. We were all unaware. That's what you were saying. Uh, yeah. These, um, the elves that, uh, that would. Assist the wizards. They, they, they're, they're sensitive to the use of, uh, to chocolate and, and the like.

And these are elves that you encountered in the jungles of Panusia. Yeah. It's very strange. I have to say these creatures experiencing and encountering mutated candy. So similar to the ones in this abandoned wizard chocolate factory. And also their bites look so similar to those of a mountain bike chain. Very interesting. Uh. Ugh. Well, time to be hitting the road. Um, you know, I'll think about it. Okay. Enjoy the show. All right. Thank you. Uh, if you could just give Maurice and I a moment.

All right. Uh, and I will, and I announce this very loudly. I will now stand up. All right. I brace my abs. I grip the knees and brace my abs and squat out of it. Uh, so hard. We shuffle out of the booth and squat. Just such a like, as the pillar of children rises to the end of the sky. And as we walk away, I say into the trench coat, I fucked that up pretty bad. Yeah. We all fucking fucked up. Fucked up. I hate this. I am stressed out. I need a hot drink. I need a hot drink.

I need a hot dog or something. Guys, I don't know what we should do. She seems really suspicious. We look back. She's watching you and a burly, a bouncer lean. She waves one over and leans down and whispers in his ear. We got to get the fuck out of here as quickly as possible. All right, let's walk. Franklin, can you walk like fast, but not suspiciously? Casually fast. Yeah, just lengthen that stride. And then it's like a, you know, speed walking. Mm-hmm. Okay.

So what are you, what are you rolling? This sounds like a group action. What are you rolling to get out of here without dropping? I'm rolling to get out of here without drawing any more attention to yourselves. Finesse to speed walk out of here. Okay. So you guys are basically, now that you know, now that you know that Tina's looking at you, you're trying to like bolt. We're going to the code check right by the door. Yeah. Okay. They also have a vending machine there. Uh-huh.

So we can pretend to look at snacks. Yeah, totally. So I, sorry, I just want to be clear. You're not leaving. You're going to stay and try and do more of your plan? No, we're going to, we're, we're bracing ourselves to get out of here. Okay. Just a few steps. I see. So you're getting ready to leave. Yeah. We're getting close to the door by walking casually. Uh, and then as soon as we're close to the door, we might just fucking all out run. Run as fast as we can.

So who's lead, we're doing finesse. Who's leading the action? Uh, Franklin, I'm from the lake. Yeah. Okay. Gotcha. I have two in prowess. Okay. Oh Lord, please give me two sixes. I would love a six. Let me see. How many sixes? A four. Five. One. Okay. So I just put it on the consequences. Okay. All right. Uh, and I think that the consequence is just going to go ahead and fill these in. So you've got one pie left on the Tina catches wise clock. She's got a hunch.

She's got a hunch that something's up and, but right now she thinks that it's somebody competing somebody that knows something about the chocolate operation. She doesn't know it's the cool tree kids, but she thinks somebody is on to her score. I tipped too much information. Yeah. Too much about what was in the chocolate factory. No one should know that much. Yeah. I fucked up. I fucked up, guys. We shouldn't have given her a sample either. Yeah. You guys go over to the vending machine.

Not to mention my mountain biking scars. It's so obvious. This is Norco across my shit. For some reason. So you go over to the vending machine. There's a vending machine in the corner. It's a big glass box with rows and rows of treats and there's a little elf standing in like a crank elevator and he's like like gesturing to the candy. And we're just using the reflection of the glass to like look each other in the face and talk. Oh yeah. What are we going to do, guys? What can I interest you in?

Shut the fuck up for a second, dude. Hold on. We gotta decide between us. Glossettes, peanut and raisin. We have candy cigarettes. We need to get out of here. She's on to us. Raisin. Alright, that'll be one spear buck. Fenton jams his spear buck into the machine. Spits it back out. Yeah, he's like, no, you gotta didn't put it in right. Fuck! Can I roll a prowess to get it in right? Yeah, totally. I got a four and a three. I resist the consequence. I'll take two stress. Okay, so it pops back out.

No, I didn't put it in right. I fucking hate you so much, dude. Click, click, click. He's like cranking himself up to the row with the raisin glossettes and he cranks himself over with a different crank. In front of the glossettes, if you want them, gotta put it in right. Oh, I take that with my finesse. I'll roll finesse. And he's doing the thing when you rub it on the corner of the vending machine to kind of smooth it. Okay, fine. We're trying to sort something out. So stressed. I got a six.

Okay. Oh my god. So while we do that, we say, okay, maybe we'll just take the candy like casually. Return, tip our hat, and casually walk up the stairs, limbo out of here. Yeah. That sounds good. And if we look back and there's a bouncer coming for us, we abandon the costume and just flat out run, right? Oh shit. Yeah. And if they try to follow us, we go down into the sewers where they can't fit. Yep. We run. We go into a vent. Yes. Or a sewer, whichever we see first.

The elf starts to pull out the glossettes and they get stuck halfway and he goes, oh no, they're stuck. Oh my god. And you see in the refrigerator, reflection of the glass, the bouncer approaching you from the back. Oh shit. Slowly weaving through the crowd. Fenton, just mention, hey, the vending machine's broken. Oh, and then he'll have to fix it. Yep. Aha. So I turn around and I go, oh hey, dude, vending machine's broken. The glossettes are stuck. What are you using for this? Uh, I guess whey.

Okay. So this is pretty desperate. He's obviously coming for you and you're like, vending machine, bro. Yeah. But yeah, so desperate standard. So you're taking a point for this. Four. Okay. Success with consequence. The Tina catches wise clock completely fills. Fuck! Fucking kidding me? The bouncer turns and sees the vending machine and he goes, come on, bro. You just gotta give them the candy. They already paid for it.

But as you turn to go to the door, Tina is looking at you from all the way across the bar. Shit. And she nods. And she takes a bite out of her cigarette holder. Yeah, bites her. It's candy. Bites her candy cigarette holder in half and chews it thoughtfully as you, what, leave? Yes, yeah. She doesn't send anybody after you. What the fuck? She just watches you leave. That's scarier. That means she knows who we are. I am not gonna sleep for a week. Okay.

Let's just calmly walk out of here and then we run. Yep. Once we're out of sight. Mm-hmm. Did we forget that we're already, we get out of this club into another club? We're gonna sprint through the… But if downstairs is like a raucous speakeasy, upstairs is like a sad, rainy, like, noir bar. So there's like two people and that bartender. Yeah. So yeah, we get up there, we like break apart and we run away. Yeah.

The guy is cleaning a different glass as you come up and he's like, hey friend, wanna sit down? What the fuck? Just breaking it for you kids. We have diarrhea! All of us. And you run off into the mall. Damn it. Shit. A hard rain falls as the Cool Treat kids disappear into the gloom. I've never been more ashamed in my life. Yeah, we kind of reconvene in a dirty, like, maintenance staircase at the bottom underneath the staircase. This is where we come when we're ashamed of how much we've lost.

Oh, fuck. They're getting wet. Yeah. Tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why. Yeah, Clover's saying to us, this is what we do and we feel bad. Yeah. I can't see at all. I'll be great, but the picture's on the wall. That is not so bad. It's not so bad. And the hobnoblin is patting Clover on the back. I thought we were a really good gang. We're good. We're just under a lot of stress. Not everything has to work out for us all the time. We're punching way above our weight class here.

We're trying to fight against the condominiums. And the condo maximums. Yeah, whichever one's going in first. Yeah, you're right. Thanks, Barbara. Yeah. Guys, do you think that… Do you think that we fucked this up because we're trying to go at it alone? I think so. I think we need… I think we need the hot meat boys and our friends. Yeah, we're talking big talk about like banding together with the other kids, but we have to like, we have to let them help us. That's true.

Like we're still trying to compete with them in some ways. I mean, Tina's not working alone. Yeah, why should we? Exactly. Okay. Right. Also, we're fucking idiots. We need help. Can we- Can we- Master Gilbert? Gilbert never works. What were we thinking? What? No. Okay. Fuck you guys. Okay, no, sometimes he works. No, he works most of the time. He got us in there. What fucked it up was me talking way too much. Exactly. But you always demand to be on the top, doing all the talking.

You never give Franklin or I a chance. That's right. It's because you guys are too heavy. You hurt my shoulders and my abs. Well, it's time for you to work out. I'm not working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. I'm working out. My abs. Well, it's time for you to work out, just like we do. Yeah, somebody else get to be a bottom for once. You know, do you ever think of Franklin's quads?

Okay, okay, fine, and honestly, I think about Franklin's quads a lot. We shouldn't be fighting like this. You're right, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry for not letting you guys ever be the top of Mr. Gilbert. No, it makes sense. You're connected to him, he's you. Wouldn't be Mr. Gilbert without you. It would be somebody else. Exactly. But you guys should be able to make your own Mr. You know what? I'm good. I got my own thing going on.

Yeah, I got, you got your, I got my, we got our own thing. Okay. Wait, do you want to be the. And he climbs up on Fenton's shoulders. His big flappy feet hanging down in Fenton, in front of Fenton. And he's like. You know, I think if we ever have to go to like a ballroom or something, it'd be great. Okay. Let's go regroup. Yeah. Nice. Yeah. And the, yeah. Scene fades to black. Credits start to roll as the cool tree kids settle in for a night of accepting failure.

And about halfway through the credits, a scene fades into view. Post credit scene. See you. New style. After hours at the nog hole, people are cleaning up. Tina Durger is sitting at a booth. We see Tina Durger head on. We see a figure just over their shoulder. She is smoking. She looks at this person and says, you come highly recommended. Whoa. And I hope that this is just the beginning of a long working relationship. But first I need you to find the cool tree kids. Whoa. And we cut to.

The person she's talking to and see a fedora, sharp Elvin ears, a grizzled gray beard on a face reminiscent of an Indochino dill and a green leather gherkin cut to black. That was your thing, right? Yeah, it was. And that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Fenton Beasley, the slide of dual disease. So long. Playing Franklin Stein, the cutter, Paul Oppers. Bye-bye. Playing Clover Ivy Fern, the whisper, Jessica Tai.

Bye, everyone. We've been playing World of Blades by Duam Figueroa based on Blades in the Dark by John Harper. Those are both excellent games that can be found online by Googling them. Thank you to Quinn, Discord user, Patreon subscriber, listener. Just cool. Just a cool person. Thank you, Quinn. For our intro and outro music that they so kindly allow us to use. And thank you to all of you, Patreons and supporters, for listening. Without you, this show would not be possible. Thank you so much.

We adore you. And we'll see you next time. And so ends the tale of the Cool Treat Kids. Always up to no good. So tiny and greedy. And angsty they be. As they navigate crime and puberty. And though our journey may be like a conclusion. We will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to the chocolate store. As the Cool Treat Kids plan their next score. And for you, I'll gladly spout more. And for you, I'll gladly spout more. And for you, I'll gladly spout more.

And for you, I'll gladly spout more. And for you, I'll gladly spout more.