Episode 15 – There are Plenty of Other Blades in the Dark

Pickaxe You've seen them around, they sell sweets by the pound Their wares are famously tasty So here I sing, singing to you Of crimes involving chemistry Clover's the whisperer, she makes all the sweets She has a coin of addiction Benton's the sly, she sleeps in a safe And writes vampire fanfiction Franklin's the cutter, his fighters strength Despite his dance, his heart Best and brightest, they may not be But that's what they were before So gather round, friends And listen close For the tale's about to start Hello everybody and welcome to Spout More Mall Brats I'm your Game Master Sean O'Hara And joining me as always playing Franklin Stein The Master of the World And the Cutter Paul Oppers Hello there Playing Fenton Beasley The Sly Abdulaziz Hi, can you get me out of this fucking safe?

And playing Clover Ivy Fern The Whisperer Jessica Tai Hi, I lost the key Ah, fuck What's the combination? What's a combination?

Oh shit He's gonna die in there I'll take a combination B Borbo walks up and he's like Okay, to the right 69 3 to the left 420 3 to the left 3 to the right 69 And he pops it open Oh my god, holy shit You're gonna die in there, man You gotta get like a bed Okay Anyways, when last we left our heroes The Cool Treat Kids We did a little bit of downtime There was some thrills Some chills, some spills And Clover Ivy Fern Discovered that not only do corndogs still do the trick When she's having a stressful day But that hot meat boy muscle Seamus Seamus And Might like her back I mean, he checked yes on the note So like He did It's a sure thing Pretty clear confirmation Beautiful We also discovered That Fenton is still writing vampire fanfiction And knows maybe even less About vampires and love Than we first thought Yeah, he thought that vampires were subterranean Yeah, right And he was not aware there were vampires in the mall And now he's fucking terrified And In the roof Yeah, he's like Yeah Yeah, in the ceiling In a fucking ceiling What are we doing?

Not What are we doing? Seriously, what are we doing? And Franklin What was Franklin's downtime? I think I sewed a new outfit Right, he started sewing a new outfit And the last thing that we all learned Is that The Cool Treat Kids With the help of half-lean detective Corb Green Have discovered The identity Of their mysterious patron And that patron Is Doris Of shitty food So Doris is standing in the doorway Smiling at you I'm smiling back awkwardly like Are we enemies now, Doris?

I trusted you Yeah, you've been manipulating us Are you bad? You understand that I have been your patron? Yes, now we do So why would we be enemies now? Because we thought our patron was like Pulling strings, getting us to do bad shit Like, for their own gain Like a mob bust And mob busts are bad shit Mob busts are bad What have you done for me That has been that bad?

Well, we had We spilled a bunch of chocolates Uh, chocolate fudge At the fudgies To get their money And And then we fleeced a bunch of people Into giving us more money We were drug dealers for a little while there Unless I am mistaken The fudgies job was your own volition Oh yeah, that was our idea actually Oh my god, are we bad? Wait, are we the bad ones?

Unless I am mistaken Again The only things that I have asked you to do Are Get smarty root Get smarty root Which was up for my own gain Yes, in a sense And then I told you when another child gang Was encroaching on your territory Yeah, I guess those are pretty innocuous things That you did I think all the bad things are kind of our fault What about when I had diarrhea in the wave pool Was that you or was that us?

That was 100% you Fine I think we might be shitting kids Corb Corb Green Halfling detective Jingle jangles forward From the crime board towards Doris And he goes Well, Doris I for one would like to know Why I shouldn't arrest you right now For racketeering Organized crime And other such activities He's got a sheaf of wheat No, he's just holding two fingers in front of him Oh, okay It's like, you know, he thinks he forgot That he doesn't have one in his hand But he's acting like he does And Doris clasps her hands in front of her Says, if you have a way of proving That I have done anything illegal I will gladly submit myself For justice Right, you need proof for things Damn, she's good And Corb tries to take a drag off the sheaf of wheat That he forgot isn't in his fingers And goes, oh, well, there's nothing there He puts his hand down He thought he was smoking Yeah You have bested me This time, Doris I will be keeping an eye on you Now, if you'll excuse me And he jingle jangles over to One of your vents And rips the front off And climbs inside And scurries up the vent Be careful, Corb Be careful, there's a hobnoblin up there I fear no hobnoblin Him and I have come to an understanding And it's gone So Doris turns to all of you So, children Would you like to continue our partnership?

I guess so I mean, yeah, I guess Uh, like, what happens if we said no? Then you are free to go Why didn't you just come ask us to do the jobs yourself? Why all the subterfuge? The mall is a dangerous place, child The food court rules with an iron fist A greasy iron fist And I think that there has been enough time In which they have ruled And there are changes that need to be made For the betterment of everyone Are you trying to make those changes happen? I am What are those changes, Doris?

I believe that the food court Needs to be disbanded Those are big changes Where would we eat If there's no food court, Doris?

I mean the Allegorical food court So you mean more like food trucks Like just spods all over the place No, no, the food court would remain The food court's in the malls I speak of The organized crime Leaders in the High Spirit Mall Oh, the Royal Food Court Yes Royal, okay Yeah, the Wine Moms And the Orange Julius Yes And The Barbecue Kings And Arby I was gonna say Harvey Yeah, Harvey And Harvey Harvey Arby They suck the blood from everyone in this mall And line their own pockets with that blood Vampire Oh my god, are they fucking vampires?

Holy shit Fenton jumps back up to the wall Holy shit He's back in the safe And shouts, it locks Open it, I want it too I don't wanna get my blood sucked I can't, it's locked No, no, Barbo What's the combination?

No one can ever remember 69 for 2069 Cause they're not teens Yeah, she's just like Okay, if you wanna If you want to continue our partnership Then I will continue to contact you from time to time I mean, I guess so Cause you're like the closest thing I have to a mom That might be a stretch, but okay No, I think we've all Yeah Internally, I'm back out of the safe We had a meeting, we all agreed You're like our mom and Corb is like our dad And you guys are gonna get Married Fucking married Fenton had like a penis in vagina motion That he almost did And then he realized he was talking to his mom And he was like, married And then he switched it to his ring finger You guys are gonna get married Instead of putting his index finger on his finger He finished Married Incredible I am choosing to ignore that piece of information right now Wise play hard get So, um, what do we do next then?

Hmm An interesting question Yeah, you're our patron Tell us what to do Okay And to be totally honest, we're not crazy about the fact that all of the kid gangs are fucking poor as shit So, if you can help Change the world Change the world Change the world That would be great And she spreads her hands wide You have struck upon the exact goal of my operation Everyone in this mall Should not be living under the heel of the food court Everyone should have What they need Yeah That's why you give away food Exactly Shitty food is but a taste of what I wish for the entire mall Shitty taste I would like for all of us to experience a shitty mall I wanna experience a shitty mall I wanna have shitty underwear I wanna have shitty underwear Shitty water fountain And I wanna go to the shitty water park Yeah, and I wanna put on my shitty pants one leg at a time And go out into the streets And feel like people don't think that I'm weird and sticky And that they stop saying that I'm a loose cannon that flies off the handle at the barest provocation I wanna live a shitty life and maybe someday get a shitty job Just like you Then we all on the street We all on the street On the same shitty page Yeah Yes Yeah Viva la revolution Viva la shit Woo Fuck the food court I like that this has become viva la revolution It's awesome Um, okay Then there are three things that I need done And you children are more than welcome to help me with one of them Okay First, I require someone to visit the vampires of the sanguine court Next Okay And the second Benton has put his boxing gloves and Toblerone Jones fedora hat on and Wayfarer glasses She said vampires There is a go-kart race sponsored by one of my rivals that I would like fixed Ooh And there is a concert coming to the mall in a few days Catered by one of my rivals And I would like you to ruin that catering That definitely sounds up our alley Okay I like the last two Yeah I don't want to meet the vampires Mm-mm I also don't want to see any go-karts Because I personally as Abdul don't believe that they exist in this world Yeah You don't Sorry Did I say go-kart?

I meant goat-kart Oh, the goat Goat-kart Oh, the goat-kart Yeah I think the last one fucking shit up That's our That's what we do best, guys Yeah That's our bread and butter Ruining things If I am being honest I, Sean O'Hara Absolutely expected Absolutely expected You to take the last one We need a name for a band The Lone Tree Mittens Trolls The Lone Tree Hill Let's do a new one, perhaps No Okay I think Do we think it's a Like a show?

Because I was thinking like a band band Oh Like a dance No Oh, there's a dance Cool, yeah Oh my god Like a middle school dance? Like a middle school dance, basically Oh my god, yes What if it's alchemical romance?

My alchemical romance, yes Oh my god My alchemical romance is coming to the fucking mall I, okay Alright, calm down Take a breath I did not know that you would like this band that much He's gripping her The bottom hem of her skirt And he's like I need to get into this concert I'll give you any amount of money or whatever I wanna go so bad Please, Doris Let us go Let us go to the concert I wanna go to the dance I asked you to go to the concert I am not stopping you We need backstage passes We need VIPs We gotta get autographs We gotta meet everybody who's in that band All 12 of them And Fenton like walks up to her like Spearbucks clutched in his hand And he's crying He's like I had saved these for the rat man But I will give them to you Stop giving money to the goddamn rat man They're free I am very much able to get you into the show Okay But you are going incognito So backstage passes are off the table We'll see about that It would draw too much attention to the three of you If all of a sudden Three grubby little children had backstage passes What do you mean little?

What do you mean grubby? What do you mean? Children Franklin just says what do you mean? So if you are amenable to this plan I will leave And the passes will arrive And in four days time The concert will take place Very good? Yeah that sounds very good Thank you So you want us to ruin the catering right? At the concert? Yes Okay Well the catering will definitely be backstage So we're gonna need those passes from you Who's catering it?

My channels have Okay fuck I need a name for a gang that does catering They're associated with Orange Julius According to Doris Little Caesars Little Caesar The Little Caesars?

Yeah the Little Little Caesar Little Caesars Little Caesars boys Yeah a guy named Little Caesars Little Caesars boys There's so many fucking breadsticks And they taste like shit The show is being catered both for the audience And backstage by Little Caesar And his boys No one likes them No one likes them They dress in togas They always have pizza with them That they're trying to get you to buy That's like 12 hours old So gross But the thing is Is that it's always hot And ready to go So it's hard to resist And it is very cheap It's extremely cheap So very well?

Yeah it sounds good to me Very well children Thank you for Agreeing to help me Good job discovering my identity And together we can work towards a shitty future Yay! Yay! Yay! We will work on the enthusiasm Sorry We're just not great with cues We didn't know if you had more to say Shitty future Yay!

I'm going to go now Okay sorry Goodbye We won't tell anybody And she comes back into the room And says See that you don't And scurries away I was waiting for her to say more words Me too I thought she was It's just the accent from wherever she's from It always sounds like it's just like halfway through a statement Yeah so that's the plan Is go to the market place And go to the market place And go to the market place And go to the market place And go to the alchemical romance show And ruin the catering On behalf of Doris It's really exciting Four days?

Yep four days to prepare How do you want to prepare? Outfits What are we going as? Stagehands or whatever?

You're going however you want to go She said that she can get you into the show So we have tickets to the door Tickets into the show proper And then it's up to you in there It's probably pretty obvious But she can have the lightest of hands In this situation If she's going to achieve what she wants to achieve Right I want to go as a guest Like a normal concert goer Is how I want to go as Yeah I wonder if she can get us Maybe we go to her the next day Oh my god Because Fenton's like Hey uh I know you want us to keep stuff secret But we need like We I think I would like an extra ticket So I can ask someone to come with me As cover And then we can go to the show You're going to have to roll something Okay Consort Okay So roll your consort Four Four Okay She looks kind of angry Oh no That you came to her booth And started whispering about her fucking secret operations No I just said I need an extra So she very loudly is like Of course Of course Child here is a bowl of shitty food for you Now go Okay I need an extra Now go Helping Understood Now go Okay I think we all need extra helpings She She gives you the bowl and she turns away Okay bye Thanks for the Fuck This Pulled pork This sucks Uh and then uh The next day when your tickets arrive There are Two extras What?

Only two? What? He only got a four Alright She knows I have a boyfriend I have to take him I think it's obvious I have a crush on someone I wonder who should get the tickets Should we all rock paper scissors? Yeah or Yeah Let's rock paper scissors for it Three way Three way rock paper scissors How the fuck does this work?

Okay Well it'll probably be obvious Here we go Rock Paper Scissors Okay Wait hold on I said there was a lot of changing Halfway through This is Four of us What was like no no no no no Okay Like basically all three of you did one thing Saw what the others did And then changed your choice Wait how do you play rock paper scissors?

Okay one more time On kids Okay here we go Stop stop Okay Wow Here's what we're gonna do Cool treat kids shoot Okay Okay we'll do it Do you say shoot or you shoot on shoot?

I'm gonna say shoot And then that's when you're gonna put down your choice Okay Here we go Cool treat kids shoot Okay so I guess You Fenton had scissors Fenton gets a ticket for sure Yeah Fenton gets a ticket cause he had scissors Which beats both of your paper You both chose paper That's bad luck Oh no And now you're gonna Compete for the last one Okay Okay Clover just so you know I hope you get it I hope you get it That's bad competitive spirit Neither of you is gonna get what you want And that's good parenting Okay Cool treat kids shoot Oh That's fine I mean If Seamus loves me he'll wait for me For another dance to go to Oh Wow I'm fine I'm just gonna go to my room cause I forgot to make the bed This is Pretty rough boys I'm gonna go No wait Borba we need your help I can't do this No no no This is not what I signed up for You can't leave We're not emotionally mature enough to handle this situation I signed up to maybe throw a little kiss to you guys I'm gonna go get a guy in a bag when he comes out of the vents and maybe yell at a kid But I am not equipped to deal with this stuff Borba please Take your rollerblades off please I only have the one I need them both Okay I can't believe I'm even offering to do this What if I go and I find somebody that has a ticket And I beat them up And I take it Above over 18 That's the rule I'll find somebody over 18 That has a ticket I'll beat them up And then I'll give it to Clover Holy shit do we have to roll for this Yes absolutely Somebody roll Okay here you do it Somebody has consort I'll have command Command You better fucking get us another ticket It works for us So I get two and you pick the highest Yep Six Six Whoa two sixes Holy shit You rolled those two dice earlier and you were like I can't keep rolling the sixes out of these things Boom they're loaded He's like alright Wait so what do you How do you command Borba to go do this I say You know what Get those wires out of here Wild nogs Oh yeah Those little arrogant little fucks I hate those little assholes I just gotta find one that's over 18 Those are the rules Oh yeah or one of their dads One of their dads yeah I could beat up a dad Beat up some dads last time I could beat up another dad I got a real taste for it now Anyways okay I'll be back Thank you And he skates out on one rollerblade Cut to Clover's room Where she doesn't know that Borba's gonna go get her a ticket Clover's listening to The quiet My alchemical romance song As she's scrapbooking She's writing her own love letters from Seamus And then taping them into the scrapbook Oh my god She's writing letters as Seamus to her Yes And it's saying like Don't worry babe I'm sure we would've had a great time at the dance But one day you and I will have a dance Just for ourselves And we'll dance under the moonlight And under the stars And then And then We will go To The movies Where we will also dance under the movies And then I will tell you I love you Because you are my dream woman You are my ultimate goddess All my love Forever Your husband Seamus Seamus And I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I mean, it should be something kind of goth, right?

Totally. Like, look at all these crayons that I got from the kids table at Poofs. He used that as eyeliner. They're all black. Perfect. Yeah. Yeah, so we'll do a pretty woman. Mr. Sandman walking down the street. Mr. Sandman. Okay, quick descriptions of everybody's My Alchemical Romance outfit. Wait, do we have to roll to actually collect the clothes that we need? Well, now you've asked, so yeah, you do. Okay. Opening yourselves up to potential further failure. Alright. What are you rolling?

Fenton wants to sneak into maybe like a Hot Topic. Can I sneak into a Hot Topic type store? Yeah. What's Hot Topic? Like H&M? It's like an emo goth store with lots of goth. Like Randy River for goth? Kinda. Clothes or like knickknacks? Yeah, it's clothes. Clothes, some knickknacks. Lots of like, you know, studded jewelry and like gothy jewelry. There's like a lot of like shirts that say like, fuck you, dad. Kinda things on them. That vibe. Yeah. And lots of like black and white checkered stuff.

Oh yeah, totally. Yeah, during like when like Ska and Emo were cool at the same time. A lot of reds as an accent color. Yeah, totally. Okay, so this place is called Skinny Jeans, but G-E-A and apostrophe S. Oh, cool. And it's run by a guy named Skinny Jeans. He's really fat. I was a lot skinnier when I opened the store. I guess it's pretty hard to stay skinny when you're across from Chunk Duncan's Chunky Donut.

Yeah, Chunk and me, we've been pretty good friends since we opened our businesses around the same time. But you know, kids, I'm gonna tell you this. You're a little young, maybe you don't get it. Being skinny? Overrated. Totes. Live your life, donuts rule, you know? Uh, yeah, what can I do for you kids? We, uh, are, uh… Big fans of yours. And of my alchemical romance. Oh, yeah. Those guys have been rocking ever since I was around your age. Really? Yeah, they're a lot older than you think.

All their songs are about their dads, though. I am well aware. Okay. So, what do you need? You're trying to dress up, so you're looking for, like, something tight, skinny, black eyeliner, the hair? Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I need skinny jeans, some kind of belt that sits under my butt, underwear that, I don't know, covers the rest of the butt, and then some kind of top. All right. Everything else is so specific. I can do, let's get you kids outfitted, and then we do the pretty woman.

So, how does, uh, let's roll your dice to see how good this turns out. Okay. Yeah, each of you, yeah. So, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, you gotta choose the skill that you're using. Oh, uh. Or the, yeah, the action. Oh, I'm gonna use, uh, Savage and, uh, Skirmish. Wait, no, hold on. What are you talking about? Why? Because I'm gonna go fucking ape shit on these and use my sewing skills to, like, rip them up and make a whole special outfit out of, like, all the sale items. What does Savage do?

Because I don't think that it does. That's my prowess is sewing. I'll accept that. Yeah, you can use Skirmish. Hell yeah. Buy clothes. Fucking go nuts on the, these sale racks, Franklin. Yeah, I'm gonna make them look good. Wow. Two sixes again. Two sixes. Are those loaded? How the fucking shit did you do that? Are these loaded? Give me these. Three times in a row. Give me these. Five and a three. Five and a three. Alright, it's just my bad luck. Uh, okay, yeah.

So, with a six, you get exactly what you want, although because you use Skirmish, it's gonna be fucking torn to shit. That's the idea. Yeah. Badass. So, how does it look? Um, it's just, basically, the back is a bit of skinny jean and the fronts are just tatters. Oh. Oh my god. Yeah, it's really cool looking. Wow, you look like you don't give a shit at all. Thank you. Uh, and, um, uh, really, um, long sleeve. Sleeves go way past, which might come, uh, might be a problem later, I understand.

We're being a sneaky fighter. A big, deep V-neck on a mesh long sleeve shirt and his hair's all backcombed going forward. Over, um, his eye. The left eye. So cool. As per the rule. Nice. So cool. And a black eyeliner on one and a teardrop on the other side. Ooh, yeah. Wow. Franklin, you look like you own the band. Yeah, my thumb's through a hole in the sleeve. Wow. But there's still so much sleeve. Yeah, it's past the… Floating in the sleeve.

It might have just been a hole in the sleeve of the shirt. Who looks pretty goth? This guy. He points his thumbs at himself. Uh, okay, Fenton. So, I'm going to use my… Uh, consort to, uh, talk to one of the salespeople in here and really try and get them to make me look like uh, your standard My Alchemical Romance fan. And I do it by just listing the songs that I know at them. And I go, Helena, I'm not okay. Um… Welcome to the Black Parade. Um… Those are the main ones, right?

Yeah, those are the ones that everybody knows. Those are the only ones that anyone remembers, really. So let those inspire you when you're creating my outfit. Alright, Kendo. Here we go. Five. Uh, okay, so five means that it's going to be alright, but not exactly what you want. There's one glaring mistake. He's wearing, uh… He's got a cape with a really high collar on it. A black satin cape with a super high collar. Like the collar goes past his head? By a lot. Like, a lot. A lot.

He's bumping into stuff. It's pulled him down a couple of times. And also the train on the cape is really long. It might be an adult person's cape. It certainly looks like it. It looks like I'm doing magic slash am a Dracula. Dracula. The way you said Dracula. Hi, my name is Fenton Beasley. I am a Dracula. Can I please come into the show? If you don't, I want to suck your blood. Uh, great. So, yeah. But everything else is correct.

Like, the skinny jeans, they're so skinny and his thighs are rubbing. Yeah. He's got a studded belt below his butt. His butt is hanging right on out of there because he's got a big butt. And he's got a long sleeve white shirt with horizontal stripes. White and black, white and black. And on top of it, he's got kind of like a greaser shirt on. And there's a name tag. It says Chunk Duncan's for life. And then he's tucked that… Into the skinny jeans and his gut is hanging out pretty far.

He looks amazing. Yeah, that's pretty spot on for the Myochemical Romance fans. But then, yeah, Fenton just got enamored with this cape. And the salesperson was trying to be like, I don't know. Like, skinny jean is like, I don't know if you have like a specific vibe you're going for. This might throw it off, little dude. And he's not even listening. He's like looking in the mirror and flipping the cape around. He's trying to use it to grab shit.

He's like, I wonder if this could be a weapon or something. What are you doing? And then he tried to do his eyeliner but it didn't work. So he just put an eye patch on it. Perfect. Clover, how did Clover… Oh, Clover, what are you rolling? Can I roll with uh… What's prowess again? Prowess is like physical strength. And agility. Okay. Can I… And a tune is… Weirdo. Prowess is like a lot of those stuff. Hippy shit. Oh. Kind of makes sense. Definitely. That's it. For sure. Yeah.

Absolutely rolling a tune. So you have a tune checked off. So you get one die. Oh, one die? Yeah, just one. Oh, please. Ugh. Clover's so stressed out. I gotta look… No! Fuck! I only got one. Shit. So that's like… Shit, that's bad. Oh, man. You had such an idea. I did. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. And I'm the gothest of all of us. Okay, gents. I don't know why I thought that was the insult that I took it as, but I definitely did. That is why you rolled a one. I didn't mean it that way.

I meant like Clover. Okay. Although Jessica Tai easily was the most emo out of everybody at this table. You don't know me. I've seen pictures. I guess, yeah. Okay, so how does Clover look and why is it a problem? Okay, so Clover's like, I'm gonna go with the back racks, because I bet that's like where all the unique and cool slash free slash cheap stuff is. Skinny Jean hears you say that and says, nothing here is free. Just wanna put that out there right now.

I'm gonna find something that's free. And I thought I pulled like a black evanescence kind of vibe gamut. I don't know if it's like a gown off the rack, but it was actually just Jean's work jumper. And I put it on and I was like, it's really big, but maybe I'm just not styling this right. So I grab a belt, which is just a bunch of tape. I thought it was like, you know, a cool like metal silver belt, but it's just duct tape. I start like cinching my waist with it.

And then- Sorry, can you remind me what you got instead of the gown? A jumpsuit. Like a worker's jumpsuit. Oh, like a janitor's uniform. Yeah. Overalls. Yeah. With duct tape around the waist is where you're at right now? Yeah. Okay, sorry I zoned out for a second, trying to look up what evanescence looks like. Oh yeah. Please continue. No problem. And Clover, because this is- Clover's like, okay, I'm just gonna go with the flow. Like she thinks this is great.

I'm like tuning in to my astrological sign, and I'm like getting all like wiccan here in the back, like for sure. I'm going to like be like this beautiful like dark witch of the woods. I'm gonna have this look, and Seamus is gonna be like wow, she's my goth queen. I love her so much. I bet- I bet she could talk to the afterlife. Clover is like super stupid. You're really asking a lot of this outfit. So I've just wrapped a bunch of duct tape around my waist.

So she's got like a bit of an hourglass figure, but it's still like a gross greasy jumpsuit that's got like a lot of donut residue on it. And we were waiting outside the changing room while she was changing, and there's like a reveal. Like- We could hear that. Yeah. Franklin looks like a fan of my alchemical romance. Fenton looks like a fan of my alchemical romance was bitten by a vampire. And Clover looks like a janitor.

And I come out and I'm like, I thought this was a gown, but now I can't take it off because I've duct taped myself into it. How do I look? Franklin and I are like, oooohhh oooohhh you. Oh my god. What? Do I look good? Are you going for good? Yeah. Then yeah. I mean obviously I gotta look hot for this. Hot. Yeah. Pretty hot. Shit. Shit. You're so hot right now, Clover. It's crazy. You look really warm. You look crazy. I am really warm in this. Yeah.

Do you think it's gonna be like air conditioned? The concert? Yeah. I guess it depends what part of the mall it's in. I can't even have a drink of water because like I can't take this off to pee. You can't drink? I can't drink anything in this. You duct taped yourself into it? Yeah, I can't. It's really hard to breathe because I was really sucking in. It's a four hour concert. It's fine. It's fine. I'll be fine. It's okay. It's fine. You look good. You look like you're… Mm-hmm.

A janitor who loves my alchemical romance. I mean, I def- the second part sounds great. Loves it, yeah. Thank you. Okay. Oh my god. You look so crazy. It's insane. Thank you. Crazy, good at alchemical romance. They have a lot of styles of fans, you know? Anybody could love them. I turn to Skinny June and I'm like, did she put on your janitor's outfit? He's not even paying attention. He's like looking across the hallway and he sees Chunk Duncan's.

Closing up the store and waving at him and he's like, sorry kids, gotta close. Time to go. Oh, okay. Time to go. Okay. Okay. Thank you. Thanks. Bye. Bye. See ya. Bye. Dang it, I really wanted a donut. Be right there, Chunk! Wow. He forgot to charge us. Sick. Let's go home. Holy shit, let's run. Nice. Uh, great. And you return to the sugar shack and Borobo's there and he's panting and it looks like part of his uh, his um, tank top has been ripped. And he's like, what's up kids? Borobo!

What do you think of our outfits? Oh, pretty good. Pretty good. Check me out, I'm a fan. Clover, I'm really glad that you got here and you escaped from whatever sort of janitor kidnappers took you. We're like, no, no, no, running our fingers down. Why does everyone keep calling me a janitor? It could be because the back of your outfit says janitor on it. No, Borobo, no, don't. No, it's cool. No, it says janitor, which is like a cool band that I know about. I don't believe you at all.

I think you're lying to me. I would not lie to you, especially considering I have this. What is that? It is an extra ticket to my alchemical romance. For me? Oh my god, thank you. That means I get to ask out Amos. I'm so excited. Good. Because it was quite an ordeal to get this ticket. What did you, who did you find? You know what? Legally, it's probably a good idea for me to not tell you what I had to do. Are you okay? Do you need anything?

I'm not going to be moving very much from this position. Um, and it might be a problem later, but for now, I hope you have fun. And he slides the ticket towards you. So, and thanks. I bring him my notebook full of vampire fanfiction, and I'm like, you can't move, so this will keep you pretty entertained until you're all good. Sick. Thank you so much. And he opens the first bit, like he opens the book and starts reading and goes, ugh. Okay. Can I make some notes? Oh yeah, go nuts. Tight. Alright.

Well, have a good time, kids. I feel like the time in between when you got this job and when the concert just showed up has progressed rapidly, but… What, it's in like two hours? Three hours? Oh, I thought it was like still in a couple of days. Well, I mean, you're all wearing your outfits right now. She's in hers. Clover can't pee. Duct tape to enter. So what do we think? Do we think that it's like today, or do we think that it's in a couple days? We have not even asked out our dates.

I know, that's why I'm saying TikTok. Okay, we gotta go do this. Okay. Alright, well, I'm gonna be here. So, uh, later. Thanks again. Bye, Barbara. Thank you. Hey, happy to help. You're the best. You're the best. Okay, bye. Hey, what's this button do? Do you have kids? Do you need to get away from them sometimes? Well, here at the Babysitter's Club, we've got you covered.

Whether you need kids watched, babysat, or cheeses grilled, the Babysitter's Club has only the best, most qualified babysitters available for all your babysitting needs. And no matter what anybody says about us, we'll never go through your private files. And we would never, ever put your clothes on and do a little fashion show for our friends. Call Kasserine Rupps! Ha ha ha ha! Welcome, Trainers. My name is Luis. And I am Chris. We welcome all Trainers, new and old, to the Purify Podcast.

We rant about Pokémon Go, a game we love just as much as everybody else. We like to talk news, updates, and our own experience of gameplay. If you want real opinions about how we play, and how we love this game, this is the podcast for you. Check us out on your favorite podcast feed. Oh, fuck. Shit. Holy shit, that played a bunch of ads. Whoa, what am I, what? Is my voice coming over the sound system? Am I in the PA right now? Alright, yeah, what's your plan for asking out people to this dance?

It's gonna be hard. We can do it. We can do it. You can do it. I mean, Indie is probably totally in love with you, so I wouldn't worry about it at all. I think so. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, what was the last thing you said to her? Like, what was the last thing you guys did? I burped. Okay, that works. Yeah? I mean, it shows you that you're a man. We were at the roller rink. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Were you guys there together? No. Okay. We were both at a roller rink. Yeah.

How close were you guys when you burped? Oh. Uh, I mean, she skated by and said, Franklin, it's nice to see you. Can't wait until it's swimming season again. And then I went to say hi and I burped. I burped horribly. I was having bergam fruit, um, soda, swamp water, and it was not good. I think I got some spittle on her. She fell over. I knocked her over on her roller skates. Did you help her up? I was so scared. I burped and ran. Um, I saw somebody else pick her up, though.

I made sure that she was okay, but I couldn't do it. That's fucking hilarious. Did you help her up? Of course I thought about doing it. But I left instead. Uh, okay. So Franklin's gonna ask out Mindy? Yeah. Okay. Where does he find her? Um, what do we know about Mindy? Do we know anything about her family? She's a life guard. Yeah. That's it. Her last name's Cart because her dad sells carts? Or her family sells carts or something?

Yeah, you wanted a thing where her dad, uh, ran the goat cart races. Right. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how that came in. She's kinda wealthy, I would assume. Yeah, a little bit. Cool. Okay, well, I wanna go down to the cart district. The goat cart track, which is called Barnyard Speedway. Oh, cool. And there's just a bunch of goats towing tiny little carts, one-person carts, and a real cool figure eight. Lot of kids having a great time. There's like a birthday party going on.

And Mindy is there with her friends, sitting at a picnic table. Okay, I brought some flowers. Ooh. Some, um, black roses. Oh, wow. What a wicked move. Damn. How'd you get them to be black? I spray-painted them. Dip them in paint. It is still wet for sure. There's like a half an hour before these roses die. Gotta move fast. Uh, okay. Yeah, Mindy's sitting at the table with her friends. Uh, okay. How far away? Uh, you know, like across the cafeteria distance, you know.

Like, you can see her, and if she turns around, she'll see you. Cool. So I go over to the part where I it's like a fence. Mm-hmm. Leaning on the fence. And then I put the flowers in my hand and just start looking really sad with like my one shoulder turned away from her. Uh-huh. Just kind of like Start sighing really loudly. And you're doing this for like twenty twenty-five minutes. Ahhh! And then smelling the flower.

Pull it- you smell the flower, pull it away from your face, there's a little bit of black paint left on your cheek. And uh, one of Mindy's friends like sees you and points and says something and Mindy turns around and goes, oh! And then comes over to you with her big cup of pop with the straw sticking out of it. Franklin! Oh hi, didn't see you there for hours. Hi! Hi! What are you doing here? Just thinking about really like dark and deep thoughts.

Just sitting over here just being really deep and thinking about sad love and unrequited clouds with full of rain. God. The darkness is so dark, you know? It's just hard to get away from it, even looking at carts. Alright. Let's roll something first and then we'll determine how this goes. To charm the shit out of her with your unrequited sad cloud thing. Yeah, right. I guess sway. Yeah, yeah definitely sway. I don't have anything to sway, so just one? No, it's 2d6 and you take the lowest.

Oh, gotta get that double six again. Two. Fuck. Two. That's a failure, man. Do we get anything? No. No. Can you use command instead? No. I'm gonna do a devil's bargain. Oh yes! So what's your devil's bargain? Is what he says out loud. Um, yeah, what is it? How does that work? Sorry. Devil's bargain, I'm gonna look, we're gonna slowly move to what I think is more towards it being more Blades in the Dark. Yeah. Fully.

So what I'm going to say is that if you suggest something significantly terrible, I'll allow you to upgrade it to a partial success. What do you mean? Like something bad happens to him? This just means that you'll get what you want. Mindy will say yes. But. I'll have to be a goth forever. Oh. She's like, oh my god. She likes the goth thing. As long as I can only date Mindy if I'm a full goth, I've started a lie. Whoa. Yeah. Perfect. Classic. So cool. High school shit. Yeah. So you start.

One time I joined a rugby team for a girl. Is that true? Yeah, 100%. I did rugby for two years. Two years? And she never talked to me. Oh, because you joined the girls rugby team. Now, did you start playing rugby because she liked rugby players or because she played rugby? She played rugby. She was on the girls rugby team. I joined the boys rugby team. There was not a lot of joint practices. Yeah, that's not really how it works. It really did not help me at all. That's rough stuff.

This is also why I was on the swim team for four years. Is this why you're also a second degree black belt in karate? No, that is because I'm a fucking loser. You hear that karate kids? Yeah, so you start doing this like unrequited cloud sad sky crying when I think about how happy the rain is, whatever bullshit. And she's like, wow, you know, I never thought about it like that. Yeah. That's deep. Well, be careful because once you start thinking about it, it's just all you can think about. Wow.

Franklin, you're so much deeper than I thought you were. I know, right? And she like puts her hand on your hand where it is on the fence. Oh my God. Whoa. It's quivering. Wow. I never realized there was so much sadness in the world. Are we watching this? Oh, yeah. I think we are, yeah. We're like, oh, that's a nice move. That burp stank so bad. We're in the Mr. Gilbert outfit watching. What's the name for Mr. Gilbert when it's Clover? Mrs. Pummelhurst. That's the Simpsons character. Pummelhurst.

Uh, Dr. Wow. For some reason, the thing that I must be so tired. I was just Dr. Smegma. So I think the winner is Mrs. Pummelhurst. And the way this is oriented is Clover's on the bottom and Fenton's going a long way. Yeah, totally. And yeah, she's like, wow, I never realized there was so much sadness in the world, Franklin. Thank you for showing this to me. Yeah. You're so cool. I guess so.

I mean, if that sort of thing matters to you, who can be thinking of cool things when there's, hey, do you like music? I do. Yeah, I like music. What kind of music? I don't know. Like, I don't know if you're like into it. If you're into goth music, like, or like cool, like rock and roll, pop, cool goth music. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm definitely into goth, goth, yeah, I like music. He's so nervous. She's getting nervous too.

She's like, yeah, I would love to go see some gorp music with you. Would you go to a concert with me? I have an extra ticket to my alchemical romance. Oh, I have heard of them. I would love to come. Oh, really? Yeah. Tonight? Yeah. Amazing. I mean, yeah, I guess. I guess I'd love to come. I mean, cool, yeah, I guess that's cool. Cut back to us for a second. I'm like, I think they're both lying to each other about, like, everything they're saying. I don't think he really likes goth music.

I think she called it gorp music. I wonder what gorp music is. Uh, yeah, but I mean, yeah, okay, so I guess I'll just come, I guess I'll come meet you. I mean, if you want to, but if not, whatever. No, I would love to, I would love to, I guess. Cool, okay, yeah, cool. Cool, okay. Well, I don't know, you want to just meet me there? Yeah, sure, whatever. Cool, I'll hang on to your ticket. I would love to. Okay. Okay. Okay. See you then. Bye! I mean, see ya.

And she walks back to her friends and she keeps looking back over her shoulder at you. And he, like, gives you guys two thumbs up. And I put down the huge binoculars I was holding. I stick my hands out from under the trench coat and I put my thumbs up. It's just two sets of thumbs coming out of this trench coat now. And then Mindy looks over at me and I go, and he slowly turns his thumbs down and then looks really sad. Friends? No. I'm so sad. Great.

So, yeah, um, Franklin has successfully asked out Mindy Cart. Sick. Because she likes Goth Boys. But does not understand goth music or has heard it ever. No, she just didn't know until this second that she liked Goth Boys. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Fenton, did you have a plan? Nope. Oh, what? I do not have a plan of approach. Alright. I am striding down the hallway, cape billowing behind me. Confident as fuck. Yeah.

And you're going to ask this girl who, as far as we know, was part of a traveling troop. Fuck. Is Penny still in the mall? I have not seen her in a few weeks. A few weeks. Okay, roll. You're gonna have to roll a fortune die, so just roll one for me. Three. So three is like a moderate middle success. Uh-huh. Which means that she is in the mall. Oh, cool. But what? I don't know. She has a fucking boyfriend. Oh. She has a boyfriend. Oh, that's really good.

Okay, so Fenton is going to where he knows Penny hangs out, which is where? Burrito Canyon. Yeah, she's in Burrito Canyon. She's a spicy lady. She's a redhead. She loves the spicy food. So yeah, you go and you, uh, you're striding down Burrito Canyon. Your cape is billowing. You look at the people walking by and you give them the invisible robe and you give them the across the center of the boulevard. And just bounces back and forth off the food booths that are across from each other.

And I'm looking for Penny. And you see her in the distance. I start walking up. Is she alone? No. Oh, no. She's there with another boy that seems to be about your age. Okay. He has long blonde hair in a ponytail. Whoa. And a frilly shirt. Whoa. And he's wearing short pants. Oh, my God. And they are both eating nachos and they're laughing. Holy shit. Yeah. This kid is intense. He looks like a Fabio, like a child Fabio. Oh, God.

I feel like I have to do something big, like a big promposal kind of thing. Oh, no. Oh, God. I got to go way over the top for this one. He's got his cane sword with him, by the way. All right. Of course. Of course he does. So he looks around to see what there is in the vicinity to use. You're in Burrito Canyon. So there's… And Burrito Canyon is a weird anomaly in terms of food service in the mall in that literally every booth is burritos. Oh. But different kinds of burritos. Oh. Yeah.

There's lots of tortilla chips. Oh, yeah. Regular. Queso Fountains. Queso Fountains. Regular tortillas. The river of Queso, remember? Right. It runs through Burrito Canyon. Yeah. I forgot about the Rio Queso. And maybe it's a canyon because there's like climbing walls on either side. Okay. Awesome. You have to climb a climbing wall to get to a burrito place. The really good ones. Yeah, there's a burrito place at the top. Yeah. And it's called Mount Burrito. Oh, cool.

Man, what a cool mall we live in. Isn't this cool? Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. So Fenton's going to take a page out of his vampire fan fictions. Literally, he went home and ripped a page for the speech. He needs a speech out of it. Yeah.

Uh, so he goes to the guy that's working the climbing wall, and he's like, I need you to hoist me up, and then when I give you a signal, drop me down, and I'm gonna kick out from the wall and try and land on that table where that red-headed girl is sitting. There is no situation in which I would ever allow any of this to happen. It is not only against the policies of the mall, but it is against the laws of both physics and medicine. Uh, what if I give you all of the spear bucks I have?

How many do we have? Yeah, there's 15 spear bucks. Okay, I stole all of them. Damn it, Fenton. Franklin and Clover. Here we go, I have 15 spear bucks for you. Say no more. Done. Okay, I have this crazy plan to ask that girl out to my alchemical romance concert. The more time that passes, the less I care. Hey, here's what I'm gonna do. You're gonna hoist me up to the top. Okay, up we go. Okay, bye, thank you. He starts pulling on the rope, and you're sailing up the climbing wall.

You're Kate billowing behind you. Um, okay. Fuck, I shouldn't have made it a thing. Yeah, probably not. Um. I do love it, though. Is there a way I can use consort? Or sway? Can I use sway? Convince me. I mean, you're trying to convince, yeah, you're trying to convince Penny. I'm trying to convince her, so when I land, I'm gonna just try and be as fucking charming. As I possibly can. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I'd say that counts. So, 2d6. Yep. Okay, here we go. My alchemical romance! And Penny! And me!

Forever! Five. Okay, five. Um. Okay, so describe how this looks again. Um. Fenton's trying to make it so the cape is billowing behind him as he descends. And then he's trying to lightly touch down on the table. And then he's gonna invite Penny to the dance. And then he's gonna make a giant, after-reading-a-speech to her. Okay. So, you're lifted to the very top of this climbing wall. That, uh, you're realizing is a lot taller than you thought it was gonna be. He's like, wait.

It keeps getting higher. Every time he pulls me up, I feel like I go 15 feet. Um, and you're so high. You can see… Everything in the Yesterland Amusement Park from the top of Mount Burrito. Whoa. Whoa. You can see, in the distance, the tumbleweed herds. Crossing them all. You can see the Annihilator roller coaster being hosed off across the… You can see, uh, um, uh, a group of some sort of small hobnoblin-like creatures climbing all over another ride, fixing it up. Oh. So beautiful up here.

Wow. You never really stop to look around when you're in the grimy depths of the food court. But when you get up high… You realize it's really quite a beautiful place that we live. And, you know… From the base of the climbing wall, you hear, down we go! He starts dropping you. And you kick yourself out? Yeah, I kick off to try and aim for the table that she's at. So yeah, you sail out from the wall. Cape billowing behind me. Beautiful. Like some sort of fishing lure.

And you see Penny and this frilly boy sitting at a table eating some nachos. Yeah. And you see that you're absolutely gonna land right on top of these nachos for one thing. Okay. And you do! You crush a bowl of nachos underneath you. Penny and the frilly boy are both splattered with cheese and tortilla chips and chives. Oh, no! Oh my god! Frank… Frank… Frank… Franklin? Fenton. Fenton? My name is Fenton. I'm sorry, we've… I don't know if we've ever really spoken that much. No, we haven't.

Ever. But I'm here for you now to speak. Oh! Sorry, who is this? And I gesture at the boy. This is my… This is my boyfriend, Grombley. Fenton is laughing so hard that he's hearing his name. Penny, is this strange cheesy boy bothering you? What is Penny… What is Penny… Uh, give him a second to speak, Grombley. And then, so I flip the cape… The cape went over my head. I flip it back and I'm like, Penny… It has been a long, long time that I have been admiring you from afar.

Staring at you… I can just imagine Clover and Franklin watching nearby… Yeah. …and hearing him say, staring at you… And then being like, no, no, no. No. And for… You are the sun. You are the sun among stars. Aw. You are one that I cannot help but notice. For you are the one to which my plants grow. The fuck? Aw. Aw? Look, what I'm saying is… I… I like you. I've liked you from the minute I saw you. Backstage at ALF, I saw you picking your nose, you were two knuckles deep. And…

At this, she kind of side-eyes Grombley. And I don't know what this guy's deal is. He seems like, I don't know, some kind of villain in a Kindergarten Cop kind of movie. And I'm sure he has a lot to offer. But here's what I have to offer. A ticket to my alchemical romance. And she goes, aw. Will you go on this date with me and then also maybe be my girlfriend? Wow. Ben, this sure was… Something. Thank you. And you crushed my nachos. Which I'm not crazy about. But Grombley paid for them.

That makes sense. He looks rich. And I don't think I've ever seen anybody do anything like this before for somebody they liked. So, yeah. Yeah, I'll go with you to the dance show. Wow. Music? Is it a… I didn't really… I was confused. They're kind of like a pop-punk band. Okay, yeah, that sounds good. I'll go with you. Yeah, they're pretty intense. And Grombley stands up at this, covered in cheese and chives. He goes, I can't believe you would do this to me, Penny.

I can't believe you would betray me so. I have everything that a woman would desire. I have looks, I have brains, and I have clothing. And you would cast me aside for this grubby ball of a man? Boy, this is not the last you've heard of me. And he points at Fenton. He says, you will rue the day that you crossed Grombley Boggy. Boggins? Okay. And he hustles away down Burrito Canyon. Wait, have we seen this last name before? Boggins? I thought so. Etienne Boggins. Etienne Boggins! Oh, whoa!

Mayor of Mudlark. But yeah, and he storms off down Burrito Canyon. Penny goes, wow, you sure destroyed my nachos. Yeah, I try and like wipe them off my pants and back into the plate. Be serious with me, Penny. How many nachos were actually in here? I can't remember. Fuck. Okay. I was really just, Grombley is really annoying. I was looking at other stuff. Oh, okay, cool. Are you still down to go to this dance with me? Absolutely. Okay, cool. Okay, I'll see you there.

Yeah, meet me outside a concert, I guess. Okay, bye. And she rolls backwards off the bench that she's on, because she doesn't feel like turning around. Okay. She hits the ground, scrambles to her feet, and runs away. Wow, what a woman. So, Fenton has asked out Penny to the dance, but has made an enemy in Grombley Boggins. Hell yeah, I have. All right, Clover. Yeah. You're the last one. What's your plan for asking out Seamus? I think Seamus is working today. He's at the hot dog cart.

So, I grabbed Borbo's boom box before we left. Uh-oh. Holy shit. Oh, fuck. And like at the back of the corn dog line. I play a song. And in this world, a boom box is a bunch of rubber hoses that you put over the mouth of a glass bottle attached to a funnel. Yeah, totally. Cool. That's awesome. Makes it so loud. And tinny. Sounds like shit. Yeah. But you can hear it really far away. Yeah. Should stay. I would only be in. Should stay. I would only be in. Should stay. I would only be in.

Should stay. I would only be in. Should stay. I would only be in. Should stay. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in.

I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. I would only be in. And people in the line start turning around. I point my finger at Seamus. Start doing a dance. What's the dance look like? I'm stretching out my arms. Real Celine Dion moves. Yeah. I'm turning around. Point my toes. You, my darling Seamus. Will you go to the dance with me, Seamus? There's a digital ball. My alchemical romance is playing. And I want to go with you. Franklin's blowing bubbles.

I have an extra ticket. If you say yes, it's all I will ever have dreamed of. And I will always love you. I will always love you. You. You. Pretty good sustaining of that note, Jessica. Thank you. That was amazing. That was genuinely impressive. Oh, thank you. Yeah, well done. Well done. I didn't roll for that. No, and that's the things you have to now. Nice. Shit. If you loved it. So wait, what are you using? I guess you're saying prowess is like aggressive? Yeah, kind of.

She's being emotionally aggressive. Being emotional. Emotionally. That singing was really prowess-ness. What's your skill in? It's in a tune, and I'm a whisper ritualist. Perhaps that was like a ritual. I always sing at night about Seamus when I'm feeling emotional. I'll allow a tune. Okay. So just one dice? Just one. Please. A tune. Five. Five. Yeah, nice. If only I had held that note longer, Seamus would have been a hardcore yes. So partial success instead of an unmitigated success. Fuck.

Can you take stress to make it an unmitigated success? I don't think stress exists. Wait, stress does exist. You can take stress to make it an extra die. Oh, shit. I'll take stress. Yeah, you can take stress to roll one more die. Okay. So I think it's two stress per die? Yeah. Yeah, so two stress. God, I forgot about stress. That's stupid, huh? Well, that was just two stress you took for no reason, I guess. Yeah. You can take two more. Yeah, I'll take two more.

I really want him to go to this dance with me. And I'm getting… And he hasn't said anything for a while, so I'm like… He's just standing there looking at you. I have five stress. That's okay. I can do it. Jesus. Six. Oh! Unmitigated success! It's like 45 seconds of silence, and I'm sweating bees. I think that while you were playing this song, the line was like turning around like, what the fuck is going on? Yeah. Why is this girl and her grubby friends putting on a performance?

Fenton was holding a disco ball in the end of a pretty long fishing lure, and it was really hard to hold it up. I was hitting a lot of people in the face with it. And Seamus looks at you, and he's holding two wet corn dogs that have since turned into dry rice. So he just dripped the batter all the way down onto his hands. Yeah, okay. I'll go with you. Yes! And all the older people, teenagers, and adults go… Aw! Yay! Woo! So sweet!

Some of them aren't clapping, and Fenton jabs them with his cane sword, and he's like, fucking clap! It's a big moment. Okay, all right. Fuck, kid. Jesus. I mean… Uh… A deity that exists in your reality. Anyways, I got to go. This guy runs out of the crowd. Wait a second. Follow that guy. And I think that's where we're going to end it for this week. All the Cool Treat Kids have successfully asked out their crushes. Yay! That's exciting. All right. Thanks for listening, everybody.

I've been your Game Master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Franklin Stein, the Cutter, Paul Oppers. Take care, guys. Playing Fenton Beasley, the Slide, Abdul Aziz. So long, everybody. And playing Clover Ivy Fern, the Whisperer, Jessica Tai. Bye, everyone. With the golden voice. This show is only possible due to you, our beautiful Patreon supporters. And we are eternally grateful. If you like the show, tell your friends. Tell us what you want out of Patreon stuff. Go ahead.

Shoot me a message anytime. I'm available. Join our Discord if you haven't already. As patrons, you have access to exclusive channels, including Discord streams. Q&As, and then intermittent streams of other shit, kind of whenever we feel like it. Yeah, sometimes I edit on stream. Yeah, sometimes I play video games and talk to people. Paul, do you have an idea? Yeah, I'm going to put a stream up. You're going to see me in a stream. Bathing in a stream. I've got so many streams.

Live stream of Paul bathing in a stream. I'm going to be live streaming a brook. You're going to love it. I love it. Thanks to Drew for suggesting Chunk Duncan. Yes, thanks to Patreon patron and Discord user Drew for the name Chunk Duncan. Yeah. Do we use any other names from the Discord? No. Oh, Skinny Jeans. Skinny Jeans. Skinny Jeans. That was me. Yeah, that was me. Oh, and thank you to, again, Patreon patron and Discord user Quinn for our intro and outro music. It's really good. I love it.

It's amazing. It's great. Thanks so much for listening, everybody. See you next time. And so ends the tale. Of the cool treat kids. Always up to no good. So tiny and greedy. And angsty they be. As they navigate crime and puberty. And though our journey may be like a conclusion. We will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to the chocolate store. As the cool treat kids plan their next score. And for you I'll gladly spout more. I'll see you next week. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.